Forget John Reid, Pete and Lenny, There was only one AGM this week worth commenting on!
The Plastic Bag Carriers CSC AGM took place this morning and I took the minutes. In attendance was Joe from Parkhead, Tony from Paisley, Jimmy from Aberdeen, Kevin from Cambuslang, Mick from Govan and last but not least Anthony from Dumbarton.
In a very special ‘The Celtic Blog’ exclusive, I have been given the right to publish the events from such a secretive event so I’ll get right to it!
The head of the Plastic Bag Carriers CSC, ‘The Doc’ was joined by Pedro And Neilly and were keen to state from the start that they would entertain NO questions of a serious nature at all, and for all in attendance to remember that ‘Today was an occassion for laughter and also light hearted rememberance of the last year’
So here is the transcript from Today’s events
Joe, Parkhead : Thanks for letting me go first, I’d like to speak about Neilly’s contract, will he be staying after a year?
Neilly : I sure hope so, the team’s doing well so far this season and apart from a few defeats we’ve been brilliant!
Joe, Parkhead : Naw Its no that, its just yer an effin TIM and we’ve no got enough of them (Neilly laughs)
Tony, Paisley : Right Doc, why did you and pedro sanction the sales of McGeady and Boruc?
Doc : Well, both players wanted to leave, so it made sense to sell them and not lose them for nothing
Tony, Paisley : Aye but could you no huv kept em? A mean aiden’s irish and Boruc blesses himself at ibrox and hates Rangers, surely we should be keeping them?!!
Pedro: Didn’t you listen to Doc? We had to sell them to get money, to help fund Neilly’s team.
Tony, Paisley : I wont be back, selling aww the irish players am away! (Tony leaves and is later seen at Paisley Canal burling screaming ‘No Irish – No Celtic’)
Jimmy, Aberdeen : I want to bring up the poppy…no honestly, why are we wearing it? A’d just convinced ma burd to wear ma Celtic tap and after she seen it on Sunday she said it was horrible, sort it out eh Doc?
Doc : I know, the same happened to me
Kev, Cambuslang : Awrite lads, I want to ask Pedro a question, are you going to Liverpool?
Pedro : No, I’m fully committed to Glasgow Celtic, anyways, I’ve never liked bread.
Kev, Cambuslang : Thats good then, another question, why are you getting paid these bonuses when we’re losing?
Pedro : I think you’ll find I dont play, I sit back every Saturday and watch the bhoys play, you lot wanted Mowbray, I gave you Mowbray, you lot wanted Lennon, I gave you Lennon, Get off my back (Pulls out Cigar, remembers smoking ban and quickly places is back in the inside pocket of Armani suit)
Mick, Govan : How come we’ve no signed Henrik Larsson? I seen him in Glasgow the other week and he’s still got it! Lenny get it sorted eh?!
Lenny : Henrik’s 39 and retired, he’s a manager now in Sweden, but he was and is a Celtic Legend we should remember that always.
Mick, Govan : Aye but, C’mon its Celtic, he wouldn’t say no to the Celtic.
Pedro nips in : He did in 2006 then he went to Man United
Mick, Govan : I asked Lenny, he wouldn’t say no to Lenny, we’re the Celtic Lenny!
Lenny : I was captain at that time and after Henrik won the Champions League he did say no to Celtic
Mick, Govan : F*ck him then, go sign Robbie Keane then!
(Doc pushes an imaginary button and two big heavies come in and lead Mick away, Mick is later seen in Govan wearing a Tottenham strip with Keane on the back and carrying his Larsson Celtic jerseys to the recycling centre)
A few videos, one about Robbie Keane, another about Henrik Larsson and a last one about the Martin O’Neill years. Anthony from Dumbarton peeped up.
Anthony, Dumbarton : I’d like to ask you all a question, Why is Samaras still in a Celtic Jersey?
Neil : Sami has shown remarkable courage over the past few weeks, I mean only last week in training he wore shorts without Longjohns on under them, I think his efforts been extraordinary, Since Cillian Sheridan’s left he’s taken on the mantle of being the least greatest Striker at the club and he can now open jars of beetroot and he only washes his hair the once a day now, so Sami just wants a hug, Lets hear it for Sami, Hip Hip.!!….
Suddenly a greek looking man with long hair and the Hoops on appears from Neily and shouts
HOOORAY (before hugging Neilly intensely for 10 minutes)
And that was that, the key issues were covered and everyone went home happy, including Mick and Tony and everyone in Celtic land lived happily ever after, especially Georgios Samaras.
So after all that, what remains to be said? My day’s been severely taken over with the event today! So looking to the weekend? I think a comfortable Celtic victory is in line with goals from Available again Joe Ledley, Dazza Murphy and Gary Hooper in a 3-0 victory, meanwhile our good neighbours are away to their Ayrshire brothers, although they might call a truce this time and draw!