Action, yes It seems an unfamiliar sight for us passionate Celtic fans at the moment.
Match action has not been the word on our lips in recent weeks. To fill this mass void the online world of the super Hoops has been rife with mass gesticulation on linked players and those who have linked to us to get some media time in time for the January sales.
(See Hapoel Tel Avivs, Itay Shechter who name drops us then goes on, with snidely belligerence to our club, saying his preferred destination would be more south of the border.)
As for the action, the last time Celtic Park saw any real action was probably when local, fake tanned, bed hopper Alan McGregor took a de-tour with his swinging and dogging club to the car park outside the official Celtic shop just off London Road. Lets say a ‘warning slippery surface’ cone was put in that parking spot the morning after.
It seems a life time since our last match. This was way back towards the end of November, we had a match against Ingesting Catheter Ticklers. The 2-2 draw was like looking at an Anne Widdecombe bikini special in Playboy whilst sat on a full train of Nuns. Eye-aching, uncomfortable and enough to make your bedroom hotdog go inverted at lightspeed.
When the fixture against Hamilton finally comes, it will be exactly 21 days since our last competitive match. That is worryingly a hell of a long time to wait for a competitive league match. This questions the saying when dust settles can it be easily shook off? Will we be rusty and lacking again? These are questions that I am concerned about when going into an away match even if our opponents are second from bottom, Hamilton Accies.
Training has commenced some-what in the mean-time so what could have happened in all this spare time? Could we have learned a few new tactical tricks in that time? Probably no. Could we have worked on set pieces defensively and offensively? Possibly but more likely no. Could the Bhoys have been simmering on the previous bad results like a wounded animal and waiting to pounce on the next passer by? Hopefully yes.
Some fans could say this match against Hamilton is coming at the right time. They have had an enforced break like us and they have had a string of bad results in their previous 4 matches. I predict a very tough encounter indeed.
Speaking of tough encounters, my favourite story of the day, some might say a re-occurance of a story but anyways, the story on the BBC website about the abduction of two R*ngers youth players. Insert Michael Jackson or Gary Glitter joke as you please.
The BBC website states:-
“Two Edinburgh men have admitted abducting teenage Rangers football players Kyle Hutton and Kal Naismith. Ryan Moore, 23, and Paul Hislen, 24, bundled Hutton, 19, and Naismith, 18, into the back of Hutton’s Audi A3 opposite the Omni Centre in Edinburgh. Moore then dumped them in Niddrie after the abduction on 20 September.”
My initial reaction was “Ha ha ha ha ha” and after looking into the story with some emotion and regret I decided that my essence of original laughter was not good enough so I pished myself laughing further at the escapades of what could be a youthful pair of mentally deranged Chuckle brother impersonators.
In court the cheif prosecutor said; “Neither Hutton nor Naismith was physically injured as a result of their ordeal. However both were terrified during the course of this incident and a police officer described them as being obviously “shaken up” by it.”
I believe some facts are missing, naive young footballers flashing the cash possibly showing off get laid into and learn a very tough lesson more like. I am not saying they deserve this type of treatment but if it stops them being a pair of stuck up bluet!ts I am all in favour.
What angers me is the BBC story makes them out to be a pair of young defenseless rabbits in the headlights of a juggernaut, when really they where flashing hundred pound notes and sporting a top of the range Audi, I reckon BBC missed out the major essence of smug-gery that the blue pair had that day.
On a positive note I can honestly say no mention of ‘Celtic setup’ or ‘Bhoys to blame’ headline has been put forward as of yet. Even though you can put your last fiver on it guaranteed that it crossed the mind of the journalists at the Daily Retard. It does make a change that it is not our fault for once. I expected them to blame the apparent match stopping “ice” around Celtic Park but go figure.
Looking to Hamilton. My expectations are a little wider than usual. I do not know what to predict for this coming weekends early fixture. I hope for a solid win with no goals conceded.
Now over to you primed pedestrians riding the keyboards all like equestrian. I throw the viewpoint to you.
The canvas is yours….