Posted on Monday, 5th March 2012 by lordofthewing
Jings! Crivens! Help ma Broonie!
It had to be him, eh? It couldnae have been anyone decent or progressive. Like…eh, eh…..him or some other coach…..like, Paulo Sergio. He’s harmless and widnae chase young girls and sing songs aboot his parental sash down the phone to woe them into his beige love nest.
The longer Paw Broon goes on the more likely he will eventually be the face of ConDem Britain. Living proof of the benefits of working longer. The scrote is doing me and you out of a pension.
Ayburdeen are eyeing 6th place like they used to eye trophies in the 80’s and by JINGS…..they fancy drawing their way there! That’s entertainment! It’s Paw Broon porn. The sweetie rustlers are getting a bit sticky.
The Dandies are unbeaten since Christmas Eve. Santa brought them some extra steel and added boringness with their 9 league gemmes since then only seeing them score 6 goals and losing only 4. So, I really did wonder where our confidence was coming from with predictions of a landslide.
Yes, we were on a great run but we were facing another side that hadn’t lost this year and while the winning habit isn’t tasted that regularly (5 draws in their last 5) THEY haven’t tasted defeat either.
They were also the side that we HADN’T faced on oor 17 gemme winning streak in the league. For someone that reads the tea leaves, believes horoscopes and those spooky wives when they tell you that you know someone that has been ill recently this always threatened to be the natural point that fate intervened and proved that we were still human.
Fate is fickle. Ayburdeen ran in at half time a goal to the good and on level terms despite not registering a shot on target. When you are on the type of run they are..these type of things rub yer way, when yer run is coming to an end this things don’t rub yer way and leave you with a nasty rash.
Not that Im moaning. We have had a massage of luck from a blonde, gorgeous, ultimately single and into geeky slightly beer bellied men Swedish masseuse during our winning streak. That goal that wisnny a goal at Swinecastle, dubiety over a Lee Wallace header (though that will be overshadowed by the dubiety over his whole transfer soon) and numerous other breaks of the ba’, poor officiating and pitiable play from opponents means that we have used a few lives.
In the coming weeks we need to get oiled up and back on that table. We will need luck and just after we had won 20 gemmes on the spin plus went a whole month wieoot losing a goal being reminded of yer own mortality before you face the biggest 3 weeks of the season is the basis of this weeks homework at Boaby Lennoxtoon.
I was flabbergasted when I heard our team. I had spent the whole of 20 minutes trying to work out what we would do. Ki was being given the day off. Broonie was injured. That left Ledley and Wayama for the centre midfield. I had Mulgrew on the left hand side with Lizzy.
The manager made the decision that any manager 20 points ahead would have done. Any player that arrived back late or was showing signs of fatigue was rested. Our manager even included Efrain Juarez in the missing in action. That was strange. He hasn’t made the squad or bench all of February and I’m sure he was in the country then.
Mikael Lustig and Andre Blackman came in for their debuts wie predictable results. Blackman was last seen over a year ago facing Conference sides in at the fantastically named Cherry Red Stadium for AFC Wimbledon and the Musketeer Dogtanian last competitive domestic game was before the ice winter engulfed Norway.
Aye, they looked a bit rusty. That’s enough for them to be consigned to Room 101 of failed signings and proof that maybe our scouting is poor by some. Is that how you get yer kicks? Instant gratification and judgement? Have you not learned?
Lenny looked peeved. He was probably questioning his team selection and his 3 quick subs proved that. Both fullbacks were replaced while Commons was adding more weight to the thought that tying him to a chair and waterboarding him until he told you what is up is now the only viable option.
Wanyama came on also. The team needed Wanyama’d. He didn’t disappoint.
Yesterday we met what is proving to be an immoveable object. We hit it and we are still going 21 league gemmes unbeaten. We are like the bus in Speed. No-one has brought us below 30mph yet.
It’s not the end of the world.