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Celtic’s Transfer Policy: Russian Roulette With The Gun Pointed At Brendan

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Last night I had an interesting series of discussions over on CQN, in relation to Celtic’s transfer policy or apparent lack thereof depending on who’s side you take.

Actually, when I say discussions it was more like a series of mini-lectures being delivered at myself and some other people for not “grasping the complexity” of modern transfer negotiations. Now, I realise there’s a little bit more involved than picking up a phone and asking a manager at another club if such and such a player is for sale, but according to Owen Coyle today if we did even that we certainly never followed it up with a formal bid.

So I’m moved to wonder what the Hell is going on at Celtic Park right now?

One of the main arguments being proposed in opposition to those of us complaining about this lack of activity is that we should be patient, because our board is simply “trying to get the best deal for the club.” This one is the laziest argument of them all and we ought to be very concerned indeed if it’s representative of the prevailing “wisdom” inside Celtic Park.

Because if what they’re saying is an accurate reflection of the truth then our transfer policy – quite insanely – amounts to standing in a hardware store whilst our house is burning, trying to get 50p off the price of a hose.

I’ll put it another way; if we crash out of Europe in the next couple of weeks, I dare any of the board’s defenders to say, with straight faces, that we got a good deal because we saved £500,000 on Shane Duffy. (Who, remember, we’ve not even subjected a formal bid for.)

Because that’s great business, isn’t it?

Piss away £20 million or thereabouts … to save one 40th of that in transfer fees.

This is not a good strategy.

I shouldn’t have to point out how daft it is, how reckless, how counter-productive, how utterly bone, stone stupid. Yet we repeat this every single year, and every single year we get told how “lucky” we are to have a board that doesn’t frivolously spend money.

In the last two years, it’s cost us upwards of £30 million. It would have cost us a Hell of a lot more had Neil Lennon’s team not worked the Miracle of Celtic Park and beat our last Kazak opponents in the last minute of a second leg tie, and that after his team had been systematically weakened going into every successive qualifying round.

Of course, a lot is being made of our ability to sign a “wild card” player; that’s nice, it really is, but don’t get your hopes up. The best we can hope for is that he’s signed over the weekend, because the team flies out on Monday and it would be unfeasible (if we’re being charitable) to expect a guy who’s never met any of his team-mates to jump on a plane, fly thousands of miles, spend a brief training session with the rest of them and then play in a huge game.

You can see where that might not be a good idea, right?

Not much of what they do at Celtic Park makes sense right now. Lawwell has a reputation, in some circles, as some kind of poker playing genius. I’ve played poker myself; I enjoy the game. If I had his record I wouldn’t be terribly proud of it.

Bluff, call and raise aren’t just buzzwords to make you sound like a smartarse. You have to understand how each works, how they fit in to the grander strategy of playing the game, and that it doesn’t matter if you lose your entire stack on a series of shitty decisions or one big fat bad one … a loser is a loser is a loser.

What this guy is playing … it isn’t poker anyway.

It’s Russian Roulette, with the gun pointed at Brendan Rodgers.

How long the manager puts up with that, I don’t know.

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