The Diary hates it when players try and get other players booked by flashing imaginary cards or when they applaud bookings or sendings off. Bafana Bafana, I’m looking at you.
With Gordon Strachan still hindering the progress of our beloved club with us losing “£2m rated Scunthrope striker Gary Hooper” to him; it’s always nice to come back to what you know, take everything real slow and look to Leith.
In between a plain loaf and a packet of Uncle Bens boil in the bag rice we are told that “Stokes on Hoops secret signing list” as Lennon is “desperate to bring in at least one proven goalscorer”. Why is he looking in Leith then? Oh, “Daryl Murphy is also on Lennon’s list of targets but Stokes’ package, including his wages and £1 million transfer would be far cheaper” that’s why. Never miss the chance to mention that we are tight as a budgies arse.
We need to be prudent. The rise in VAT will put an added strain on the club and the freezing of Child Benefit means that our chances of recouping some money for Shaun Maloney is now slim. Where’s Uncle Eck when you need him?
“If they can get £10m for him then good luck to them. But it won’t be from City.” said a “St Andrews source” regarding Eck “cooling” his interest in Aiden McGeady. But, he has “made it clear he will only be willing to do business with Celtic if the price comes closer to the £6m mark.” while, laughably “McLeish was willing to fork out that much (£10m) in a failed move for Wigan’s Charles N’Zogbia”, which is funnier than Emile Heskey in a clown suit or a pair of football boots.
The first declaration of intent for next season. “Celtic crock Jos Hoovield” has “vowed to pay back every penny of his fee by finally producing the goods on the park.” continued “Celtic crock Jos Hoovield” “The Celtic fans haven’t even seen half of what I’m capable of yet.” and with Samarasesq foot in mouthness declared “My aims? To win the title, the Scottish Cup and get into the Champions League group stage – that has to be the team’s goals for next year.”
The man, who was greeted with such a level of excitement not seen since running water was introduced to Ayrshire, is reminded that “Lennon is already chasing other centrebacks such as Sol Campbell and Kelvin Wilson.” but with Johan on his way- a man with knowledge of “Celtic crock Jos Hoovield” then surely his talents or lack of them will be well known to the coaching staff?
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Finally, in the interest of parochial small mindedness, C’mon Solvenia..hopefully they are being shown tapes of James Corden to fire them up.
