Celt’s Ledley The Way

The Diary……would, then set fire to her and Lily Allen.

On the day that The Cardie “bemoans transfer prices” we see it being reported that we have “dramatically won the race” to land “£3m rated” “Welsh ace Joe Ledley”.

Off course, we are the villains on the piece. We have “exploited a loophole” in FIFA rules that see’s us land the 23 year old for free from under the noses of a “string of Premiership giants” and Stoke City. The player is being vilified on the streets of Cardiff and they want him burned like a Modern day witch. “Money grabber“, “lacking ambition” and “inbred haggis munchers” are a common theme on Wales premier on-line paper by those who have enough coal to power their modems.

Like all football fans hurt when a hero leaves is something that The Diary can relate to. When Owen Archdeacon left The Diary was distraught. But, a country that has inflicted Charlotte Church and fat male voice choirs on us indulging in some sort of nationalistic snobbery really does irk me when both countries are shitholes populated by dole scrounging drunk arseholes.

Tiger Bay is hardly Monaco.

Talking off arseholes, I fully expect to see Tony Pullis to be in print mouthing off about us.  He really does look like he has based his whole coaching character on the teacher from Kes. If Pullis and the Cardiff leek munchers are looking for someone to blame then they should look no further when they “turned down a £6m bid” for “Ledley two years ago“. Peter Ridsdale has previous don’t they know? He wouldn’t pass a fit and proper test to look  after a goldfish never mind a football club.

Jimmy Bullard was in Glasgow yesterday, with what looked like a beached whale who shopped in Primark. Or Barry Silkman to his mother. “It’s been really good, everything went well” cockneyed the barraboy while dressed like all Charlie Nicholas wannabes up Victorias in the early 80’s. Michael Mann’s remake of Miami Vice has a lot to answer for.

The final part of the coaching team has been thrown lions otherwise known as the press. Big Johan Mjallby is the only person I know that looks scarier with longer hair. When he returned the disappointment of his shorn locks was hard to get over. I felt like he should be showing you how to build Ikea furniture not teaching defenders how to make Kenny Miller sing like a canary. Still, he played the Robbie Keane card like an old pro down Leith docks.

“Has Neil been speaking to Robbie? Definitely.” laughed Johan before slyly adding “He’s out of our reach when it comes to buying him. But a loan would be perfect.”  Before he had finished uttering the words, Harry Redknapp had awoke from his slumber by the pool in Sandbanks and shouted at Sandra to pass him the phone.

“I wouldn’t think that’s a possibility no, because we paid good money for him and to loan him out again, it wouldn’t be a goer” said Redknapp basking in the sound of his own voice while the rest of us struggle to find any truth in what the man says. If we follow Redknapps Law then the exact opposite will happen to what he says.

Welcome back Robbie!

There will be a couple of guest bloggers over the next six days as The Diary goes on a break to the Costa Del Fife where they have just got electricity nevermind the internet.

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