I see Kris Boyd is in the news again.
I don’t even want to discuss his stupid remarks today; stupid remarks are all Boyd is know for.
You can tell how seriously Sky Sports takes Scottish football when you look at the clowns they frequently bring on to report on it.
Nobody is worse in this regard than Kris Boyd, who’s ability to make a living in an industry where you are supposed to be unbiased, articulate and intelligent is a mystery to every right thinking person in the country.
That the standard of our punditry is abysmal up here is not a shock to even the most casual observer of the Scottish game, but it saps at my willingness to keep watching every time I see that smirking village idiot reject sitting in the studio.
To find a less intelligent person on the telly you need to be watching Americas Dumbest Criminals, or go right to the master of them all, the blowhard who will be masquerading as their President for another four weeks or so.
Even then, I reckon Boyd edges is.
Trump at least has the excuse of living inside a fantasy inside his own head.
Boyd doesn’t have a fraction of the intelligence required to construct a fantasy world.
Instead he lumbers through this one, sounding ridiculous, advertising his ignorance and wearing it like a badge of honour.
Honest to God journalists must roll their eyes at the merest mention of his name.
The English do have people who perform a similar function, like Durham and Savage amongst others … but the real media people don’t take anything to do with them, and you’ll never see them covering EPL games for Sky.
BT Sport knows what they can do and what they can’t, and at what level these eejits can work and they’ve signed up a handful of them and in doing so have managed to turn their weekend sports results program into something that is on a par with the average pub football debate … it’s mildly entertaining, for about the first five minutes, but I know I’d rather watch Jeff Sterling and his band of pros any day of the week.
Boyd insults Sky’s Scottish viewers.
Or to put it a better way, Sky itself insults them by sticking him on the TV.
They would never put such a halfwit on the telly for their English audiences.
It shows a naked contempt for their customers up here to inflict this muppet on us, and it’s especially contemptuous to Celtic fans, of course, who cannot stand this man because he is totally incapable of being unbiased.
But you know something? That goes hand in hand with being an idiot.
Because I’ve never doubted the leanings of someone like Graeme Souness, but I would listen to him talk pre-match, post-match and during the half-time break because that man knows football. He’s played it at the highest level and he has managed at the highest level.
He is not just some chancer who lucked into a talent with his big toe.
Souness never lets his inherent biases stand in his way of offering proper analysis.
If you didn’t know his career history you’d never be able to tell what clubs he’d been at.
The same applies to Michael Stewart, our only proper intelligent analyst.
Boyd would be less inclined towards attention seeking behaviour if he had any brain-cells rattling around inside his head, so it’s not really the biased nature of what he comes out with as much as it’s the stupid nature of most of it.
I can’t stand listening to him because he’s an idiot, not because he’s an ex-Ibrox player who can’t hide where his loyalties lie.
What’s Sky’s excuse for keeping him on?
Not ratings. I know people who switch over whenever his face appears.
It’s not analysis, because not one person who watches him watches him for that … because he’s incapable of offering any.
So what is it? Is he the punditry equivalent of a the Bearded Lady?
If so there are other places on the telly where Sky could put his joker, like some D-list celebrity reality show that’s more his level … a band of no marks with famous names, so stupid that they can’t even get on the panel shows. Dumb, ignorant trailer-trash, just another freak in the freak show.