Gareth Bale To Celtic? It’s A Joke, And Not Even Worth A Proper Discussion Over.

Wow. Slow news day alright when The Daily Record is forced to run garbage about the possibility of Gareth Bale moving to one of the Glasgow clubs as a “wildcard” signing now that he’s out of contract.

“Odds have tumbled” on it apparently; if you knew nothing about the bookies you might think that was significant.

If you do know something about how they work you know what they are doing here is trawling for suckers.

Odds tumbling doesn’t make me inclined to want to place a bet anyway; the chances of this are so outrageous that I’d expect many hundreds to one on it before I’d even consider parting with my money, and even then, a charitable donation makes more sense.

To give this story credence – and I’m writing about it to scorn it, not to pretend that it’s in any way likely or reasonable – you’d also have to know nothing about how Scottish football works, or how Celtic in particular works.

You might think Ibrox is just this mad, but there’s a difference between taking a £2 million punt for three months and putting some guy on the wage-bill who will want that every month for at least a year.

Where does The Record think the money for that is coming from?

The magic tree?

I have beanstalk beans to sell them if they believe any of that.

Celtic wouldn’t even entertain an idea so ludicrous.

Do we need Gareth Bale to wrap up two in a row next season? Would one player, even one at the top level, make that big a difference in the Champions League? Are we going to win it with him in the team?

The cost-benefit analysis here is widely skewed against this kind of deal … we are not run by madmen.

This story should be filed under not just fiction but fantasy fiction.

But when the media has nothing else to write about, they will make stuff up and they might as well have here.