The Gareth Bale To Ibrox Story Is In The Papers Again … And Peepul Believe It!

Oh what a world. What a crazy football environment we operate in where a club can be so clearly on the bones of its arse and yet be linked with all manner of multi-million-pound business.

The directors are facing a new court case, they have just gotten rid of one major problem, the whole club operates on borrowings and last season ran up a bunch of them.

In spite of their European run, reports from credible sources suggest that they have to sell if they want more than one signing.

All this is known. None of it is a secret.

Yet ridiculous stories link them to a Russian based striker for £8.5 million … and now Gareth Bale.

Where does this lunacy come from?

Our club has banked the £40 million Champions League windfall, we have got money in the bank, we’re actually trading at a transfer surplus for the last year … and we do not indulge any of these barmy fantasises.

It is crazy that any of them think this is worthy of discussion.

Some of them are even debating about where in the team he would play.

In goal maybe.

It is like believing in the tooth fairy to the extent that you’re openly wondering what happens to the teeth he collects, and whether they are really recycled by little elves into something useful.

Ally McCoist thinks he can sell the player on a move to Sevco because Scotland has good golf courses.

I guess that’s a substitute for having the money to make him even a token offer. That guy will have interest from all over the EPL, including Newcastle who have the cash to pull it off.

Spurs might fancy it. Manchester United are another possibility.

He will have offers from Europe.

From huge clubs and the kind of lifestyle he has gotten used to over there in Madrid, one of the most beautiful cities on Earth. But he’ll come here, for an SPL salary, a shot at defending the Scottish Cup and a good game of golf.

What planet are these Peepul living on?

This is a club trying to put together a deal to keep Allan McGregor because they don’t have enough in the budget to stretch to a half decent replacement.

In the meantime, their websites are buzzing with this wildcard nonsense.

They are nuts.