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Kyle Lafferty’s Last Dance Gave Celtic Fans The Last Laugh Yesterday.

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At the end of last season, on a night out, I bumped into Derek McInnes and several members of his Kilmarnock squad in the Horse Shoe Bar. I thought I was imagining things at first.

The guy standing next to me at the bar couldn’t possibly be the former Aberdeen boss, could it?

I went back to the table I was at and the guys there said yeah, and pointed out that some of the players were dotted around the room too.

One of them stood out a mile.

It was big lanky Kyle Lafferty.

It was weird to see him close up, and no surprise that he tried to be the centre of attention all night.

We know what Lafferty is, after all.

We know what he’s always been.

For all that, I had clean forgot that he was at Kilmarnock until I saw him running out onto the pitch yesterday and I could not believe that. “Hasn’t this guy retired yet?” I thought.

There was a time when Lafferty loved playing against us and I hated us coming up against him. I never thought he was a great player or anything but he was one of those people who raised his game against us time and time again.

Yesterday he looked like somebody way overdue for hanging up the boots.

For the first time in a long time he played against a Celtic defence that was comprised of big bruisers like him, and they made easy work of him. He was reduced to grumpy, moaning, griping, sniping and hoping to win a penalty.

It was all pretty pitiful … not that any of us have much pity.

Lafferty hasn’t just been one of those players who is annoying to play against.

He’s another player who has got by for years on making his loathing for our club and for our fans perfectly clear. He was booed every time he touched the ball yesterday – which wasn’t often.

He was cheered for every mistake, which was nearly every time he touched the ball.

When he finally left the field he did so to mixed boos and sarcastic applause from our fans, having thoroughly wasted his manager’s time and offered exactly nothing to his club.

Why do these clubs persist on giving contracts to these over-the-hill has-beens?

Still it was a perverse pleasure to watch this particular one lumber about the pitch yesterday like some de-clawed toothless lion.

If this was his Last Dance then it’s fitting that it was we who got the Last Laugh.

It’s a fitting end for our story with him.

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  • John Copeland says:

    I know what Lafferty is too! Amongst other things ,this is someone who sent inappropriate pictures of himself through the internet! Not too long after, was welcomed back into Scottish football like a long lost relative! This is a wrong yin ,from feet to crown.

  • Bharney says:

    Not a mention of Laughfferty’s attempt to boot Moritz in the groin, leaving his shorts ripped, you could clearly see him raise his boot after both landed following a high ball joust, and even a close up of ripped shorts didn’t tempt the commentary team!

  • Roonsa says:

    Was it Strachan who tried to sign him for us when the huns were going for him? I mean, of all the PR fuckups Celtic have made over the years, that one has to be right up there. Even if it was just paper talk to make us look small then Celtic didn’t do enough to quell the rumours. I don’t believe it was though – someone out there will remember more than me.

    Lafferty is a hun. Not in the same way that people would say Kenny Miller is a hun. I thought Kenny Miller was a good signing but Strachan managed to balls that one up somehow. I remember that night he scored two v Benfica in the Champions League, it was a brilliant game for him. Sadly there wasn’t enough of them but I liked Kenny Miller. No so much now obviously but I would never call him a hun even though many would. Lafferty is a hun. A bitter one. Hey, that rhymes ….

    Lafferty is a hun
    A very bitter one
    I hate him very much
    Tomorrow I’m supporting the Dutch.

    Thank you, I’m here all week … try the veal.

    • Ujeste12 says:

      Try the Schadenfreude its seasoned with smoked Hun tears

    • Woodyiom says:

      I’m with you on Miller – I would have happily seen him stay at Celtic – frustrating how often he could mess up easy chances (particularly one v ones) and then score a screamer BUT he always played well in big games and his reaction when he scored his 1st goal for us (ironically against the Huns) shows he gave fully 100% and all his heart for whichever team he was in.

      I wouldn’t p*** on Lafferty if he was on fire.

  • Kevan McKeown says:

    This clown should hang up his (orange, and it was pathetically deliberate with him) boots and spend more time on his apparent internet ‘past-time’. Has never hidden his loathing of our club and fans, so it was good to see him getting bossed by CV and co, throwin himself down in the penalty area etc. Was desperate stuff, but an entertainment plus for the Celtic support. He’s done, ta ta.

  • Kevan McKeown says:

    Still tryin tae work out roonsa’s ‘godfather scene’ reference………

    • Roonsa says:

      It’s not a Godfather reference. I know what you’re thinking of. But it was just a reference to a 70s working men’s club comic …. that’s all it was. Don’t overthink things mate.

      PS. Lafferty is a hun prick xxx

      • Kevan McKeown says:

        Just havin a wee laugh mate. Nae probs

      • G. Benpii says:

        Lafferty = the bawbag’s bawbag
        Should have been sent off after fouling Turnbull and then booting the ball at T’s head, and the incident where he assaulted Big Moritz… aye, got away with both…only in Scotland. ( Courtesy of a graduate from the Lanark Association of Referees… !!).

  • Johnny Green says:

    I’m going to keep my comment short.

    He’s a bitter orange hun bastard,

  • Effarr says:

    He was there to lay in the boot. I could never understand what Darren O Dea saw in him. 🙂

  • Eddie says:

    Even mention of his name makes me sick. I can never forgot his horror challenge on Andreas Hinkel. The guys a thug.

  • SSMPM says:

    Reminded me of his overacted dive to a fake head butt leading to the opposing player being sent off. The next time we played them at Paradise the PA played the old Elvis classic – ‘I can’t stand up for falling down’ (not that Elvis).

    • Woodyiom says:

      Charlie Mulgrew for Aberdeen – absolutely shocking. Walter Smith made him apologise to Mulgrew afterwards but of course by then the damage had already been done.

      He did the same when him and Broony tangled but at least in that one Broony does actually move his head towards the cheat so there was an tiny element of a headbutt but a yellow would easily have sufficed….

  • Scud Missile says:

    Laughferrty is an absolute TRUE PONCE he also visited The Sraracen pub in Possilpark over the years with some sevco players at the time.
    Always avoiding having to buy the drinks when it was his turn to go the the bar and expected the regular punters in the bar to stand his round when it came to paying for the drinks.
    I stood there and seen it for myself he played the big look at me I play for sevco I’m a superstar PONCE.

  • Jaxs says:

    Still doing what he’s always done, stealing a living…

  • Jim mccready says:

    He was seen clearly telling docherty to sub him before full time

  • Katana67 says:

    Why has Lafferty not already been referred for a retrospective RED CARD..RED CARD ????

    He was clearly ‘at -it’ from the very start of the game, in stark contrast to his stroll around Ibrox the previous weekend.

    This latest incident was even more agreggious than the one involving Charlie Mulgrew, in the game ,Aberdeen v Old Huns (1066-2012) RIP…

    He intentionally sought to make forceful contact with Benz’s groin region, by flicking a boot upwards as he fell to the recycled linoleum, in a prone position.
    A normal instinctive human reaction would have been to try to break his own fall….
    Clearly, a hun-stinctive gimp reflex action prevailed, which denied the Basic Laws of Physics [Newton’s First Law….as Michael Stewart will confirm ]

    As Cicero declared, back in the day, ” A Hun Will Always Be Hun….Whichever Guise He Wears “

  • Starman says:

    NEVER made a challenge in 90 mins v the FILTH, strait in after 20 secs against us then shda been booked after 4! A FUKIN UGLY UGLY MONKEY HUN BASTARD, MUSTA BROKE 50 MIRRORS WAE THAT FUKIN MONGEL COUPON BAWAHAHAHAHAHA!!

    • Roonsa says:

      Is that the way you laugh IRL? BAWAHAHAHA? You must get some pretty odd looks. Does your family disown you when you are out together? To be honest mate, with a laugh like that, I would as well if I was in their shoes.

  • Jon faud says:

    Loved your description of that has-been and he couldn’t do anything against our defences Hail Hail

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