Even as Celtic were motoring to a title, and towards the possible treble, there was one area in our game where the competition was at its most fearsome, and that was in the arena of journalism. The annual contest to see which former Ibrox player emerged as the stupidest individual to have a gig in the mainstream media is always intense.
Over the years, numerous Ibrox luminaries have been attracted by the pursuit of this coveted title.
Barry Ferguson proved that his brother wasn’t the only brainless dolt in the family. Kris Boyd went above and beyond the rest by claiming the esteemed crown as Village Idiot. We’ve seen Alex Rae, who gave up a lucrative house-haunting career for his media gig, and Alan Hutton battling for the prize. Neil McCann is always in the mix, and so is Ricky Foster.
But Kenny Miller is doing more than just staking his claim. His recent media pronouncements have been so dense, so divorced from reality and so toe-curling you almost feel sorry for him. Over the weekend he “got the calculator out” and concluded that The Mooch has “gone toe to toe” with Ange since he was brought in. Wow. He needed a calculator for that?
Look at the league table. If you want to view this as a simple minded idiot that’s all you need, right there. The gap now is eight points whereas it was nine when he came in. So what?
That gap was 13 points not that long ago, which is four more than when he was hired. What happened since then? Well, Celtic won the league title and our players eased up.
This is not difficult. You can actually look back at our fixture list and see the moment the form started to dip below our ruthless standards; it came after we’d dispatched them in the league at Celtic Park to virtually wrap a ribbon round the trophy.
We went to Kilmarnock and played one half, then chucked it. Then we drew at home to Motherwell. We beat Hearts to clinch the title but then lost to the Ibrox club and then drew to St Mirren.
The Hearts game was the league decider. Which we won. What was the other massive game we took part in between winning against the Ibrox club at Celtic Park and this weekend?
It was in the Scottish Cup semi-final. And we won that too of course. Because when it matters that’s what this team does. It wins when the winning is required. It wins when the winning is important. If we slow the pace down some for the damp squib matches I can fully understand why. That’s a psychological thing that has cursed bigger clubs than us.
Napoli won their title. Then lost. Barcelona won theirs. Then lost. That’s two examples just from the last fortnight, in Italy and Spain. If Miller thinks that The Mooch really has gone “toe to toe” with Ange and Celtic, based on his calculator, then he ought to consider that three matches in the league between the sides were still to be played when he arrived.
Celtic won one, drew one and lost one. But the draw was a massive result for us because it kept us nine points clear and snuffed out their lingering hopes. The win was huge, because that sealed the title.
The loss came after the big issues had already been decided.
Sandwiched in between were two massive cup ties, including a final.
We won both of those. So not much going toe-to-toe there as that was two wins out of two for Celtic. I mean this is literally so obvious even a child would get it right off the bat. The pattern here is unmistakable.
The Mooch has won a lot of games against the other teams in the league … his record there is excellent, although we’ll see what it’s worth when everyone is back to zero again.
Miller’s pronouncements are becoming increasingly, desperately, cringy.
He is starting to sound a lot like a guy saying stuff just to generate headlines.
If he believes even half of it then he’s a weapons grade moron who really will be challenging Boyd for his own title, or worse; vying for private quarters at Hidden Hills, the Big Hoose With Padded Walls.