If I was talking to a neutral and I wanted to sum up the poverty of the Scottish sports media I would do just one thing; I would point them towards the collective works of Hugh Keevins, and his entire career spent broadcasting nothing except for his own ignorance.
A collection of wrong-headed predictions, a lack of basic knowledge, the celebration of smug arrogance with nothing to back it up and a contempt for the reader which is extraordinary.
He shouldn’t have a job in any media, anywhere, not when there are rhesus monkeys who could easily be trained to do his job. He is one of the reasons that a lot of publishers are watching, with interest, the rise of AI chat-bots.
If the trained chimp could do what he does, then there is no way that a machine wouldn’t be able to do better … the presence of people like him in the mainstream press is a danger to real journalists. It’s also a sign that publications have given up looking for talent, and that’s a disgrace when there is so much of it out there. The blogosphere is full of it.
His latest article on Celtic is nothing more than an outpouring of bitterness and spite.
There is no rational argument in it, it’s just him mindlessly ranting about everything that, in his dire opinion, is wrong at Celtic, including our system for signing players which in the past seven seasons has netted us a fortune in transfer fees and built teams sufficient to deliver five trebles and a double. The very things he has identified as weaknesses are what make us strong.
That, just on its own, should be reason enough for this industry finally drumming this clown and people like him out of its ranks.
I’ve never liked the guy. I always thought he was a no-talent piss-taker masquerading as an industry professional. If I was in accounting at his paper I would go as far as to query why he’s worth his salary, and straight-up refer to him as a wage thief.
His bosses could probably hire two or three good young up and coming talents for the money they pay him, and that’s on them, because he is one of the reasons nobody reads their paper.
It has been a long time since I read an article quite like the one he put up this morning, an article which is not only written in such a way as makes me long for computer-generated content, but one that got nothing right whatsoever, from its opening line about the “unanimous” view of Celtic fans on our new strip until the final bit on how Brendan Rodgers must be unhappy with the team building thus far, although he’s in charge of it.
An article accusing us of penny pinching whilst praising Ibrox for backing its boss with big money is one that is hard enough to take seriously. When he presumes to speak for our supporters I always feel my hackles rise, because he certainly has no right even to try. His suggestion that we’ve done nothing but make “project signings” is contemptible.
The idea that this guy knows anything about these guys is absurd, just as the idea that he knew anything about any of the players Ange Postecoglou brought to the club is. This is a guy who doesn’t know the footballers in our own proverbial backyard. Our record in finding quality for relatively low prices is as famous as his lack of knowledge is.
He has no idea – none of us do – whether we’ve signed first team capable players or not because, surprise-surprise, nobody has watched them yet.
The more I’ve written that this past week the more clownish comment to the contrary has appeared in our media, whilst at the same time the praise that is lavished on Ibrox’s mostly free transfers reaches fever pitch. It’s hard to take that seriously, and we’re not supposed to I don’t think.
Because the media doesn’t even take itself seriously here anymore.
If it did, it would not have someone like Hugh Keevins working within its ranks.