In June AD 68, Servius Sulpicius Galba became the emperor of Rome and the first to rule who had not emerged from what historians call the Julio-Claudian dynasty. He took power in the aftermath of Nero’s suicide, which itself grew out of a civil war. Galba was one of the men who took advantage of that period of chaos. He was supposed to usher in a new era.
But he was an old man by the time he took power, and very quickly alienated friends and allies.
When he chose, as his successor, the nobleman Piso Licinianus it was too much for some to take. Galba and Licinianus were murdered in a conspiracy headed up by Marcus Salvius Otho, who was crowned emperor himself. He probably thought he would rule for years.
He ruled for three months.
Aulus Vitellius was a commander of legions in Germania; he was already part of the civil war, in open rebellion. When his armies defeated Otho’s at the First Battle of Bedriacum, the newly crowned emperor went the way of Nero, committing suicide upon realising he was finished and just like that Rome had a third emperor in a short space of time.
But again, his reign was not built to last. The Eastern Provinces had their own hero, Vespasian, and they proclaimed him emperor. That led to another great burst of violence, and at the Second Battle of Bedriacum (a small town in the north of Italy) Vitellius’ army was crushed. He tried to surrender and pled for his life. Vespasian’s soldiers executed him.
And thus concluded the Year Of The Four Emperors. Vespasian was crowned, and the Flavian Dynasty was founded. The bloodshed didn’t end there – Roman history has been full of bloodshed – but for a while at least things calmed down.
To hold down the empire you need to be strong. Note that. You need to be strong, not just act strong, not just throw your weight around and talk big. We’ve seen Ibrox regimes which you knew from the start were pitifully weak.
Pedro Caixinha, in spite of his early billing (courtesy of the most pliable, gullible journalist in the business, Keith Jackson, who styled him as a Portuguese James Bond man of action), was one of them and it was clear from the first day he was in the door.
With The Mooch, it was obvious early that he talked a better game than he was able to deliver.
Gerrard projected toughness, but he had been on the brink of the sack when COVID saved his job.
Van Bronckhorst actually was an accomplished leader, and might even have done big things at Ibrox, but he inherited a lazy dressing room full of born losers who, by their own admission, chucked it the minute they left Sevilla, losers again but feeling that they had done their bit and no longer needed to push themselves hard on the club’s behalf. I always thought he had all the personality of a wet mop, but Van Bronckhorst went down swinging, albeit swinging at his own board for, as he saw it, failing to back him in the aftermath of getting to that final.
In a pattern which is easily recognisable, the media which had hailed him as a hero and the fans who were talking about building statues in his honour, turned on the drop of a dime and out came the knives and down he went in a pool of blood.
Ibrox is a weird place to try to set up a dynasty.
More than a few Roman emperors were put in power by the Praetorian Guard, who although they were supposed to be absolutely loyal to the ruler of the state actually had their own agenda and were fierce guardians of their own ability to influence events. Think of the Ibrox board. More interested in their own survival and power than anything else.
The plebs, the people, have no patience when it comes to having their conditions improved. They want results and they want them now. That’s the Ibrox fan-base. And because the citizenry is so amped up all the time, there are people waiting in the wings who grow strong from this. Individual generals. Senior politicians. In this case, think hacks who get close to the regime. Fan media reps who ingratiate themselves to the new leader.
But none of these alliances are built on any real loyalty. They are marriages of convenience, and when it no longer is convenient the inhabitant of the throne, who until that point had thought himself surrounded by cheerleaders and sycophants, wakes up one day paranoid and fearful and not without good cause. Because by then the plotting is underway.
Ibrox bosses have started seasons in serious peril before.
Hell, one of the most amazing things for me in watching UK politics unravel over the last few years has been covering football’s equivalent of that as Ibrox has gone through just as many leaders and outbursts of crisis and disaster all the way through it.
The UK’s most violent convulsion saw three PM’s in a year, and whilst we’ve not had our Ibrox Year Of Four Emperors (not yet haha) the shelf-life of an Ibrox boss has been reducing, and is now less than the average can of soup and so the mayhem has been the one constant, almost matching that of the Tories. It’s been the one thing you could count on.
Yet I cannot think of an Ibrox manager who has started a season in such obvious, and imminent, peril. The Belgian was hired in October last year. I will be astonished if he gets to his first anniversary as boss.
Aulus Vitellius, the third of the Four Emperors, lasted eight months, so Clement has surpassed him anyway, but his throne is already under serious threat and the danger is looming from so many sides and so many sources that you can easily imagine how it could collapse fast. He looks doomed. He sounds like a man who knows it too.
Jackson attacked him the other day for “getting his excuses in early.”
Excuse me for stating the obvious, but if you’re in Clement’s shoes what other choice do you have?
He thinks some of his players are selfish and unfocussed. He thinks the fans are impatient ingrates. He thinks the media are snakes. He thinks his own board lied to him. He thinks they are incompetents who can’t even get a simple stadium upgrade done right. He has been told to sell before he can buy and although he started out saying that his key players weren’t for sale he’s been forced now to accept the potential departures of all of them, if the club can find mugs willing to buy them, for nominal fees. He’s drawn the line on one; the keeper. He knows that won’t hold.
He was bested by Rodgers last year on every occasion they met even though one of those games ended in a draw. He knows he’s not got many more of those in him, and the next game is at Celtic Park. He starts the season away to Hearts, where even Naismith must smell blood on the wind and fancy his chances. There are two enormous European qualifying rounds, and the team he looks likely to face in the first of them just scored six goals to virtually wrap up their own first leg.
He has no idea when his team will set foot in their own stadium.
His dressing room is factionalised and riven. Half of its inhabitants have at least a fair idea what he thinks of them, and the feeling is mutual, in the worst possible way. These guys are absolutely not going to run through walls to save his job. That would be survivable if he had time to clear them out, and the chance to bring in his own guys … the chances of that recede by the day, and the media’s lunatic talk of massive bids for big players is known, by Clement himself, to be absolutely ridiculous. What he called, himself, “fake news” just the other day.
His relationship with the board is not in great condition either. He’s agitating for money they are not prepared to spend and claiming that he was conned when they offered him the job. Where is their incentive to give him more time if he runs into real trouble, if this is what he might do? If every day in which they retain confidence in him results in him making the statements that erode the fan’s confidence in them? That won’t be allowed to happen.
If he follows the media’s mood music – and I strongly advise that he does – he will already know that they cannot be trusted at all, that every one of them who banged his drum loudly was forced to their knees to kiss the ring of the true Caesar, Rodgers, at the end of the last campaign and a lot of them feel pretty humiliated by that, and they aren’t blaming our boss for it. They are blaming him for not being able to carry their hopes for them.
The others include opportunistic predators who smell blood in the air and cannot wait to cover another execution and the subsequent coronation of a new leader. They might be the most dangerous of them all, because they’re not even acting out of love for the club but just enjoy the chance to chronicle the chaos which follows. They will not hesitate to give him a shove if he’s hovering on the cliff-edge but won’t do the decent thing and jump.
If you polled the fans, they’d still be with him, and probably by a wide margin, but Keith Jackson’s article the other day was a clear-cut message to them, from inside the club, that they should be looking at the way he’s setting up the team and offering a colder critique. This is partly tactical; the fans have their eyes fixed on the boardroom right now, and they are ready to pour their scorn and hatred on the directors. So, even as Jackson accuses Clement of getting his excuses in, his piece was nothing short of the board’s effort to do the same.
So, whilst Clement is saying “blame them” they are saying “blame him.” Jackson’s decision to highlight the club’s failure to sign Shankland, and to put that decision on the manager, effectively blames him for the loss of the title. It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not. It doesn’t matter if the money was there and he chose not to spend it or they couldn’t have gotten a deal done even if the manager had been the striker’s number one fan.
Jackson is using Shankland as an example of Clement’s rotten judgement, and that’s a sure sign that the lime has been purchased and the pit is already dug.
Still, if he wasn’t facing such high-pressure games Clement could, in theory, just get his head down and let the fans pour their bile and vitriol in the direction of Bennett and his happy band, and hope that they can pressure the people in charge to get him more time or money. The Praetorians didn’t assassinate popular leaders; as strong as they were, the general population outnumbered them and could still bring the whole house down.
But Clement does not have the luxury of a honeymoon period now, and I wrote about the moment the possibility of that ended on the moment when I knew that it had; the day their club went top of the league, having over-turned our seven-point lead.
As I said at the time, had he come in and done a passable job of steadying the ship and making small, but visible, signs of progress, had he come in and closed the gap, he would have had a free hand this summer and when the crises erupted around him he would have been completely free from the blame; the fans would have given him all the benefit of the doubt in the world, and a bad start to the campaign would then, definitely, have been laid at the feet of the board.
One of the things that made last season’s win so satisfying for us and damaging for him is that once he had his nose in front their fans expected him to finish the job. He lost his one alibi – that the mess was someone else’s mess and he was still working to put it right. The moment he got ahead of us it was his to lose … and he lost it. Not only that, he failed to lay a glove on Rodgers and that, more than anything, has been devastating for him.
So, if the failures happen, if he drops points at Hearts, loses at Celtic Park, goes out of the Champions League and falls behind us early, there will not be a whole lot of forgiveness in the stands, just cold-blooded calculation and the swell of fear and loathing.
I think he’s finished, and as any student of history knows, failed kings do not die peaceful deaths; even those exiled to distant shores aren’t always safe there.
Pompey Magnus fled to Egypt in the aftermath of his defeat at Pharsalus; he had “friends” there and thought he would be safe. As his boat docked at Pelusium, a former soldier who had served in his army, Lucius Septimius, stabbed him to death because the ruling faction was engaged in a civil war, and Ptolemy XIII thought it would please Julius Caeser.
In short, the Belgian Waffler is in a whole lot of bother here.
As another dangerous man once said, “If you think this has a happy ending, you haven’t been paying attention.”
The new CelticBlog “emergency podcast” on the transfer window and the issues we face is available below.
I don’t know nearly enough about the Roman Empire and it is a subject that I am interested in. Not as much as the royal lineage in England from Henry VII right up to the Cromwell republic and beyond. If you want to talk about political machinations and power plays I am sure there are plenty parallels in those stories as there are in the history of Roman schemers.
I do like these historic preambles, do keep them coming.
Not really anything for me to disagree on here which I am relieved about. Although I do take issue with your thinking that Naismith will smell blood for the first game of the season. As per usual, that fud will drop his breeks, bend over and say “Stick it right in there, big boy” to Baldermort. Nothing is going to change in that regard whilst Naismith remains in charge at Swinecastle.
I would normally like yourself Roosna think that Naismith would just lie down to his ‘beloveds’ from The West…
However if he thought he could impress and have a half chance of the said west ‘beloveds’ then it might be different for once v them on opening day…
But the west ‘beloveds’ are not so very reciprocal of ‘wee Naisey’ as he is of them after their death and when he deserted ship quicker than the rats do (how apt rats deserting) eh… (And was one of the most vocal about just why he did)…
Still – If he thinks he has a chance to impress Bennett, then who knows…
Not too long to find out…
And why do the clubs that finished third and second get to curtain raise the new season as well…
Only in Fuckin Scotland of course through Sky Fuckin Sports Scotland !
The “Shankland to Rangers (sic)” stories have started right on cue. Nothing ever changes so we have to just repay their monotonous predictability by sickening their sorry heart once again.
Nothing in Scotland ever changes. We had the chance to break the wheel in 2014 and shat it like Scotland always does. Now we are stuck with a UK Labour govt who have already shown their true colours by backing down on promises previously given.
Expect the usual “penalty to Rangers” to get the ball rolling. In fact, fk it, let’s make it two.
I wonder if Tavpen will still be around to take them …… see if Celtic had treated a team captain like the way he’s being treated right now – we’d never hear the fking end of it.
Brilliant ?
Enjoyed that James-fine read right there!
I quite enjoyed we who are about to die and nice to see ramsey can get about
Megalopolis did you see?
Haven’t seen either yet, but We Who Are About To Die (it’s about Vespanius, isn’t it?) is on my list.
I am DYING to see Megalopolis cause it re-tells the story of the Cateline Conspiracy, one of THE most fascinating dramas in Roman history, and which involved my hero Cicero.
brilliant james…yep….it’s only a matter of time now…
until i started reading your blog…i never realised that clubs/organisations could manipulate the press so readily….it’s soooooo bleeding obvious now…jackson – as you have pointed out,many, many, times – really is a snake of the worst kind. i wouldn’t accept a fish supper if it was wrapped in the DR…
i actually have a certain amount of sympathy for hun managers arriving from outwith these shores…but i guess it’s really up to them to do due diligence…and see exactly the kind of scum they are getting into bed with… grim for the average hun…but by jasus it’s great craic watching and reading…..
We all know how this goes:
sevco rack up poor performances / results,
and the SMSM copy/pastes what comes out
of the Blue Room.
Clement is getting the blame for everything!
He’d earn respect if he simply did walking away – now. 🙂
Why is no one highlighting the fact that the Goldson’transfer’ doesn’t make sense. He’s their top earner with two years left on his contract and they are happy to accept £1m for him? And he’ll presumably take a massive pay cut to play in Cyprus because that’s how badly he wants out? If that happens then there’s something else going on there. I watched the game today and was pleasantly shocked at how bad they were, the fud commentator had some cracking excuses and apparently Matondo will be the main man this season.
If Hearts don’t bleed and give Sevco Shankland on the cheap then they could challenge for 2nd.
Cantwell wants out, rumours about Butland, I can’t sleep for giggling
It is crumbling my man. 🙂
What – The Copeland Road James…
The Crumble Dome then –
Or Crumble Doom perhaps…
Apple Crumble with The jelly n’ ice cream then –
Talking of Apple Crumble – Their computers will probably crumble next…
And hopefully their Champions League challenge as well !
A very good piece James, great analogies regarding the Roman Empire and the consequences of failure and it does resonate with the Huns clusterfuck situation.
However, do you know something, I actually find the whole Ibrox chaotic state quite tedious now. They have been well and truly Espanyolified, with more to come, and with this slow painful metamorphosis they have become insignificant and barely relevant. Of course it is still pleasurable for us to wallow in their demise, but as time progresses even that pleasure will be watered down and dismissed as we all realise that they are just a second rate outfit that we used to scorn and poke fun at.
As regards Naismith, I think even he will smell blood and try his best to put the boot in to hasten Clemence’s exit. He might even be entertaining thoughts of being the heir to the throne and he will be craving to dip his big blue hooter into the poisoned chalice.
Your recent writing has been brilliant James.
Remember the 3-3 celebrations, that really said it all to me. That was the measure of his ambition. That was as close as he could get over 5 games.
Our manager seems to have incentivised and motivated our players and they look much sharper and connected than last season.
A good coach will do that and anything additional now we add knows where the bar is set.
I’d be lying if I said I could name 5 rangers players right now.
3rd or 4th time saying this i think they will be battling for 3rd place this season. A real clusterf*. Long may it continue. HH