Was it something I did in another life?
I try and try but nothing comes out right for me
Bad karma, killing me by degree
I took a wrong turn on the astral plane
Now I keep on thinkin’ my luck is gonna change someday
Bad karma, it’s uphill all the way
I can’t run, I can’t hide, I can’t get away
It must be my destiny
The same thing happens to me every day
Bad karma, comin’ after me
Bad karma, killin’ me by degree
– Warren Zevon “Bad Karma”
Earlier today, we talked about The Hollow Men.
For now, let’s focus on one hollow man in particular: Philippe Clement, the Ibrox boss, a dead man walking.
That term, by the way, comes from the US penal system, specifically death row, where officers would shout, “Dead man walking here!” as they moved condemned prisoners down the hall. It’s a ghastly image, but the next time Clement walks into an Ibrox press briefing, you can bet that more than a few hacks—and nearly all the fan media—will have that phrase running through their heads. Because the countdown clock has most definitely begun for him now.
You’ve probably heard the expression, “For want of a nail, the kingdom was lost.” It’s a saying that James Baldwin popularized, although Shakespeare and Benjamin Franklin have also laid claim to it. The phrase implies that small things can have massive consequences.
But until last night, I’d never heard of a kingdom being lost for want of a nail clipper.
We can thank Philippe Clement for that one. Years from now, there will be no doubt about who gave rise to this absurd notion.
That Clement has somehow lasted more than a year is the only remarkable thing about his reign, but most of us think he won’t make it through to January. Getting him to the end of next month would be a stretch. If he doesn’t make it, they’re back to square one, marking the fourth consecutive year they’ll have had to replace a manager mid-season.
His position with the supporters has become untenable.
They’ve listened to his bizarre, contradictory excuses, from his claim that a toenail cost them the game last night to his baffling disbelief that a team nine points ahead in the league might actually be better. He talks of his “young” side needing time to settle, even as Aberdeen—who just rebuilt their team—are proving what a settled side looks like.
He even tried to justify the loss by claiming his team had played more games than Aberdeen, which you’d think would give them … err … more time to settle.
It’s all nonsense, and their fans have had enough.
If you ask supporters if they’ve seen any signs of improvement, they’ll tell you they haven’t. If you ask whether any player has become a better footballer under him, the answer is no. He just doesn’t seem to bring anything to the table.
And frankly, he’s an odd character. Right from the start, some of his interviews painted him in a strange light, though the media was quick to shower him with praise.
One that sticks with me is the interview where he said he left his wife because she didn’t share his “winning mentality.” Paul Simon sang about “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover”; well, call that number 51. Who else has ever left the mother of their kids over a reason like that?
Even stranger, he went on to say he never let his children win at anything, believing it would make them more “successful.” That’s cold, suggesting a person devoid of warmth. I can’t imagine having that personality in the dressing room.
He’s dropped hints of this strange worldview in other interviews too, like when he told players to “stop having babies,” saying that the baby boom in the dressing room was affecting form. How do you lead when your players think you’re mad, or worse, heartless?
Last week, regular readers will recall, he took a swipe at the fan media when one of them dared to question his style of play, describing the team as boring and lacking attacking intent, with too many side and backward passes, and long balls. Clement’s reply was that a long ball is attacking, so the fan’s point was invalid. That response was met with disbelief, even anger.
Whatever hope or faith there was in him has completely evaporated.
Don’t forget, every Ibrox manager starts with a reservoir of goodwill because each Ibrox fan wants to believe that the next guy will be the one to change everything for the better. No club’s fans cling to that hope as much. Yet he will become their third manager in a row sacked early in his tenure. Whoever they bring in next knows the countdown clock will start on day one, and that they’ll have to contend with Brendan Rodgers and this Celtic side.
Clement’s record against us is terrible: six games, five losses, and a single draw, which he celebrated as if it were a win—even though it was a massive setback to their title chances.
It’s no wonder that the media today is already speculating on his replacement, and the fans can’t wait to see him gone. Matters like the enormous cost of sacking him or the fact that they might not even have someone with the authority to fire him since they lack a CEO and a chairman seem like small obstacles right now.
Had he been only nine points behind Celtic, he might have gotten away with it, since we’ve had an exceptional start to the season and they’ve been bogged down by chaos, largely self-inflicted. But he’s nine points behind Aberdeen as well. He’s lost three league away games since the season started, crashed out of the Champions League against a poor Dynamo Kyiv side, and now faces a match on Sunday that could see him out of a job by Monday morning if he loses.
It’s just a matter of time now.
He’s finished, this hollow man, this arrogant figure reduced to a gibbering mess every time he faces the media. If you’ve watched politicians as long as I have you’ll know what I mean when I say that power has a visible effect on those who wield it. Some thrive on it; others visibly wither and end up aged and broken. If Clement had hair, he wouldn’t now.
Very soon—though not soon enough for their fans—he’ll be gone. But what happens next? They’re strapped for cash, and if they sack him, they’ll be even more so. They don’t have many options either, because each managerial dismissal and each angry shout from the stands make that job less and less appealing to anyone with even a grain of self-preservation.
The question haunts them, and in the meantime Clement wanders the halls like a ghost, except that he’s technically still in the land of the living, just like those US prisoners on death row.
Dead man walking. They’ve got a dead man walking here.
James, sorry to correct you but the toenail catch phrase was coined in a game between Spurs v. Sheff Utd, maybe 3 years ago. I think Lundstrum was called off side when SU put the ball in the net. From memory there was a 7 minute delay.
Flip flop seemed confused, he was saying we do not want another 2012 but new players would be coming in Jan? Really!
What about Tavpen pass for the dons second. How does he keep his game.
I was surprised to see two borderline decisions go against them in a big game even though the penalty was the worst penalty you’ll see taken, it’s not the kind of decision that goes against Beaton’s boys in these games. Maybe Beaton has had enough of Clement? If the new guy gets in quickly we’ll see very quickly these things evening themselves out.
Hopefully motherwell smell the blood in the water and go for the kill.
Be nice if young Lennon Miller rips their shit midfield to pieces.
10 quid double on celtic , motherwell .
Remember his extravagant claim, that we were goin tae see the ‘real’ rangers in Oct and November. Now it’s been put back until January.
Where do they get the compensation money from to sack him.
Fire now pay later.
Not sure why Balogun was not sent off. Yes he gets a touch on the ball but the follow thro wipes the Aberdeen player out. If the Aberdeen player was still on his feet he would have been able to get to the ball. Got that completely wrong for me.
He sounds more like a sociopath, and on a new managerial change it would be like the zoo keeper being taken round the zoo and management asking the animals if they like him before giving him the job , no one in their right mind would touch that job , probably why flip flops there.
Please let jump-the-dyke McCann get the job. Watching them turn on him would be just delicious. ?