The pyromaniacs should travel to Zagreb and take a look at the Celtic fan’s possible future.

One of the things I’ve enjoyed most in recent years is travelling abroad with Celtic. Madrid, Rome, and Dortmund rank amongst the most memorable trips, and under different circumstances, I might have attended a couple more of the away games this time around. I almost certainly would have enjoyed a trip to Zagreb—I’ve heard nothing but good things about the place, and it’s one of those destinations I’ve always wanted to see.

But I wouldn’t enjoy the prospect of being strip-searched before the game. That doesn’t exactly scream “welcome tourist destination,” does it? The news that Celtic fans might be subjected to such treatment annoys me because I know people who are going over, and they won’t be happy about it, nor should they have to endure it.

But here we are—living in the world we’ve made.

For years, the debate over pyro in football has revolved around one core idea I find hard to swallow: the notion that it’s simply part of the game now, an unavoidable element of the fan experience that clubs and regulators must somehow accommodate.

In Scotland, the term that keeps cropping up in this debate is that clubs need to “work with the fans” on pyro. I find this absurd. Pyro is illegal. Unless there’s a fundamental change in the law, there’s nothing clubs can do, even if they were inclined—and most aren’t. What does “working with the fans” even mean in this context? Turning a blind eye to the law? That’s impossible, even in an open society like ours, and especially without consequences.

Another argument I often hear is, “You’ll never get this out of football stadiums.” This feeds the first argument—the justification that clubs must find a way to tolerate pyro because fans will keep using it regardless. But that’s not how this works. If clubs can’t enforce the law, they’ll turn to those who can, asking authorities to take an increasingly heavy-handed approach.

People will say the Zagreb authorities are out of order—that such treatment is excessive, humiliating, and shouldn’t be allowed. And I agree. Strip-searching fans is grotesque overreach, not something any of us would find acceptable here. But again, we live in the world we’ve created, and this is the consequence of certain choices.

Do I think it’s proportionate or necessary? No, of course not.

Subjecting people to such treatment without cause is abhorrent. The Zagreb authorities might claim they’re justified, pointing to items they’ve discovered in unbelievable hiding places, but that doesn’t excuse such invasive measures. It’s an intolerable situation. If I were there and faced with a strip search, I’d be furious, knowing I’d done nothing wrong.

Still, let’s be clear—this is the shape of things to come if pyro use continues unchecked. I’m not saying we’ll have strip searches, but increasingly invasive techniques are going to be used, and increasingly rigorous checks will eventually be made.

Those who argue that pyro is here to stay should take a hard look at the Zagreb approach and ask themselves if they’re still so sure. Authorities determined to stamp this out will escalate measures until they succeed. That’s the real message here.

We often underestimate the state’s power to impose its will when it decides to go all in. Living in a liberal democracy, we take certain freedoms for granted, but the state, when armed with authority and tools, can do things most of us struggle to fathom.

If people want to support the pyro enthusiasts, they should consider what that might mean. Imagine queuing for hours before games because every single fan is subjected to a full-body search. Picture sniffer dogs, X-ray machines, or, in the event of a mass use of pyro, entire areas locked in at full time while everyone inside is detained and tested.

If that sounds extreme, think again. There’s a limit to how much authorities will tolerate, and once that limit is reached, enforcement will become uncompromising. The first time someone is caught with pyro, taken to court, and hit with a custodial sentence simply for possession, it will send shockwaves through the fan base.

Let me remind people of the law here. Legislation passed in 2022 makes offenders liable for a £5,000 fine and up to six months in custody. When that law went before Parliament, it passed without a single dissenting vote. Not one. That’s how much political appetite exists for tolerating pyro in football—none. As I’ve said from the start, you can’t find a single supporter of it in the legislature and because there’s no support for changing the law that law, unlike pyro itself, is here to stay and you can take that to the bank.

So whilst I don’t believe Scotland will see strip searches at football matches, we are heading towards a less tolerant landscape, and it’s utterly unnecessary.

There’s no reason for such inconvenience to be forced upon 50,000 fans at Celtic Park because a handful insist on playing with fireworks.

So, if you’re in Zagreb and feel outraged when asked to strip, ask yourself where you stand on the pyro issue. If you support it, acknowledge how we got here. Yes, it’s outrageous, and yes, it’s mortifying. But the authorities are responding to a problem they didn’t create. If their measures seem extreme, it’s because the problem is escalating—and things could get far worse.

One day, someone will get seriously injured or killed by pyro here in Scotland. I hate it as much as I believe it will come and I pray that it never does because aside from the tragedy itself – which is entirely avoidable – I know what our stadiums will look like in its aftermath.

Those attending in Zagreb might be witness to a version on the extremes, but they are getting a glimpse of our possible future.