For Celtic fans who enjoy a little bit of hilarity, there was an obvious upside to the current Ibrox management team getting appointed—and we knew it at the time. We got a lot of laughs out of it.
But there was another benefit, one that someone did point out early on, and that was the hope that Barry Ferguson, Neil McCann and Billy Dodds would all be removed from their media gigs, giving the rest of us a wee bit of respite.
Because it is genuinely appalling how much of the mainstream media in this country is filled to bursting with ex-Ibrox players. To see even a handful of them leave their posts to go off and do the job they actually wanted to do—coach their favourite club—felt like a blessed break. Or so we thought.
What’s happened since, of course, should have come as no surprise at all. Scott Arfield has taken over Ferguson’s gig at the Daily Record. BBC Scotland has given Steven Naismith a platform now. So nothing has actually changed.
The media is still filled with ex-Ibrox toadies, just as it ever was. We are still dealing with overwhelming bias in commentary and in sports coverage, and the standards continue to fall at an absolutely staggering rate.
Because these aren’t the sharpest kids in the classroom.
Over the years we’ve watched the likes of Ferguson, Boyd, Hutton, Thomson and others wander across the media landscape like zombies out of The Walking Dead, and we’ve all wondered what on earth is going on. Why does the Scottish sports media keep scraping the bottom of the barrel like this? Why do they keep going after the daftest people possible to try and appeal to the broadest demographic, rather than finding actual examples of insight or intelligence?
And this isn’t new. Derek Ferguson has been employed by BBC Scotland for years—a man who somehow makes Barry Ferguson look intelligent by comparison. That question, about why they constantly settle for the lowest common denominator when it comes to ex-players, has lingered for a long time. But the more I think about it, the more I realise something important.
It’s the wrong question.
Because when you see Naismith trying to lecture anyone on tactics—an idea so absurd it’s genuinely hilarious—or you read Arfield attempting joined-up thinking and joined-up writing at the same time, you suddenly have a moment of clarity. Something that in hindsight is so obvious you can’t believe you missed it. Something that feels so impossible that it can’t possibly be true—and yet, it explains everything.
The Scottish media isn’t scraping the bottom of the Sevco barrel at all.
These are the smart ones.
As hard as it is to believe, as utterly mind-boggling as it seems, these guys—this current crop—are the elite. The Brains Trust. The best and brightest their club has to offer. These guys are the intellectual powerhouse of Ibrox.
And that’s why every time they bring in someone new, it seems that the average IQ drops even further—because the smart ones already have jobs.
We really are going down the list now.
I can’t believe the low quality of Naismith and Arfield’s contributions. It’s painful. It almost makes you pine for the return of Billy Dodds, Neil McCann and Barry Ferguson to the media ecosystem. It almost makes you wish you were hearing more from Kris Boyd—and that’s saying something. As difficult as those guys are to take seriously, I can’t take this current lot seriously at all.
And when you can’t take the pundits seriously, it makes it incredibly difficult to take the media seriously. Not when these are the people who keep getting handed jobs.
Just when you think they can’t go any lower, they do. Just when you think they can’t get any dumber, they somehow achieve it. It’s almost beyond belief. Except that it shouldn’t surprise us anymore.
Because if we reject the question we started with—about why the media only hires the dumb ones—we’re left with a more compelling one.
Is everyone in Sevconia stupid, or what?
Have they lived in a fantasy bubble for so long that they can no longer see anything beyond it? You can blame the parents. You can blame the schools. But I tend to look at the culture itself. That supremacist mindset. The belief that the world belongs to them, that it owes them something.
And when you think the world owes you something, you don’t feel the need to work for it. You don’t feel the need to learn anything new. You certainly don’t feel the need to exert yourself in the pursuit of goals. Why bother, when you think success is your birthright?
Maybe it’s as simple as that.
All I know is that the media has never been filled with so many of these people, and the coverage has never been worse. I used to think this was simply fault thinking, because these people had misunderstood the audience, putting in front of a camera or a microphone people to dumb down the coverage.
Now I realise that, in fact, they’ve been hiring the smart ones all along; they know they have to tailor their coverage to the Ibrox fan audience, and they’ve been going out there and snapping up the brightest and the best.
It blows the mind to consider that possibility, doesn’t it? But look around you and tell me that I’m wrong. They can’t find one – even one – equivalent of a Martin O’Neill or a Chris Sutton? They can’t find one Stan Petrov or Neil Lennon?
Maybe I’ve been underestimating guys like the Fergusons and Boyds of this world all along. They are, in fact, the elite. Besides, as bad as they are, it’s the people who hire them who are the real problem.
Spot on
This actually must be against the law. Hiring cannot be be decide by one small criteria, having played for either Rangers or Sevco.
Of course you have to be a surgeon to be hired as a surgeon but not say only one with black hair.
To get hired with the BBC you have to be an ex-footballer but only one from a certain tradition.
The BBC have guidelines and rules and I don’t think this practice would stand up in court.
“Go Fund Me” anyone?
I think the reason we see so many ex-ibrox players is they are willing to be the foolish “heart on sleeve” pundit who doesn’t hide the bias & will avoid criticising the club or certain players.
It’s like they are scared they will be cut off by the club or something if they do.
Where as ex-Celtic players are comfortable calling the club out, players or manager with no fear of an unreasonable response & so they come across as a far more neutral view point.
It doesn’t create controversy when someone can speak facts about a performance or situation that everyone can see where the view point comes from.
But these ex-ibrox players squirm to find the positives other than KB losing his shit in the first half of the season.
Worst 2 for me are Arfield & Miller who when on commentray like McCoist can’t help but let the bias take over.
I’m not a big fan of Hutton but I think at times he can at least hold an objective view & imo will be the one to have the best longevity as a pundit with that.
Feels like Miller lasted one derby & got the dunt for his nonsense. Wouldn’t be surprised if Arfield was the same after the parkhead game where he offered zero analysis on the game
You got it spot on in your last few lines James…the ones who hire them !
Nepotism/discrimination/favouritism, use whatever word you like, but it all comes back to the same thing.
If we base recruitment on trying to acquire the best and most suitably qualified for any job, then obviously
our main broadcasters have continually went off piste!!!
Certainly more like taking the piss!!!
I appreciate we laugh at these imposters, but it is utterly incredulous, guys like Nayclue Smith, Arsefield, and the Village buffoon are our footballing “experts!”
Add into that anchorman Thompson, who can barely read his autocue or string two coherent words together and you indeed have Scottish football’s answer to the Muppet Show !
We need to clone Sutton, Lennon and Michael Stewart whilst bringing back Bob Crampsey and A McPherson ( showing my age lol)
Could it really get any worse?
The hirers, need to turn into firers, and get a modicum of intelligence back into our football punditry!
Presently, our second rate TV deals are filled with obtuse mutants, that helps to appease a certain demographic, whilst the rest of us have to suffer!
Like so much in Scottish football’s, things have to seriously change ! HH
Edit * Like so much in Scottish football, things have to seriously change ! HH
Interestingly, none of the Celtic affiliated pundits you mention is Scottish. There actually appears to be a considerable lack of Scottish pundits associated with Celtic operating within Scottish football. Peter Grant makes the occasional appearance on the BBC, but is that it?
JT, perhaps they just don’t want to work alongside La crème de la crème of Hundomery.
They possibly, even correctly, judge that they would be unable to tolerate the constant bias and low IQ output from their
Numpty colleagues. I know I would find it impossible to resist taking the piss out of them or even just calling them out live on air or in Print.
Besides the argument is mute. A reasonably sensible, literate neutral, even Celtic leaning Reporter / Pundit wouldn’t get by the front door not with the current restrictive Hiring procedures employed by the pro Tribute Act SMSM & Unionist Broadcaster.
Won’t be long anyway before the rags shut their printing presses down for good. As for the Broadcasters I just turn the sound off and luxuriate in the knowledge that I don’t fund the SMSM or the BEEB and haven’t done in the past almost 15 years now. GIRFUT (sideyways).
JT, perhaps they just don’t want to work alongside La crème de la crème of Hundomery.
They possibly, even correctly, judge that they would be unable to tolerate the constant bias and low IQ output from their
Numpty colleagues. I know I would find it impossible to resist taking the piss out of them or even just calling them out live on air or in Print.
Besides the argument is mute. A reasonably sensible, literate neutral, even Celtic leaning Reporter / Pundit wouldn’t get by the front door not with the current restrictive Hiring procedures employed by the pro Tribute Act SMSM & Unionist Broadcaster.
Won’t be long anyway before the rags shut their printing presses down for good. As for the Broadcasters I just turn the sound off and luxuriate in the knowledge that I don’t fund the SMSM or the BEEB and haven’t done in the past almost 15 years now. GIRFUT (sideyways).
I don’t fund them in any whatsoever way so it’s not gonna annoy me…
I do however very much appreciate when The Celtic Blog exposes their anti Celtic evil so thoroughly and it gives me something to get off ma tits to the well named Scummy Bastards of The Scummy Scottish Football Media…
No doubt the two up the street will have been up to the shop even in the piston rain today to get their fix from The Scummy’s of course…
For Fucks sake they don’t even do Page 3 any more so why would they buy the fuckin rags…
Strange Strange Strange Celtic supporters – At least when they carry out that retarded daily trip anyway for sure !
Edit = PISSIN rain not fuckin Piston rain as it reads !!!
I’ve not bought the Daily Record for many a long year and, despite it being always biased in favour of its hun friends, I still bought it in those days. For however bad the football coverage was, it had the best horse racing section by far at that time and I also loved doing their ‘Wee Thinker’ crossword’. The internet provides my needs now for those two habits, and I have no idea what the attraction of buying it now can possibly be.
Proud of ya Johnny – Lets us Celtic supporters put the stinking Liars to their stinking Lairs !
“These are the smart ones” hahaha!
It could be true but they are all so thick. The media can’t wait to hire any of them no matter what intellect limitations they might have. Arfield hasn’t even retired yet and he’s been lined up for a cushy pundit job beside all his old team mates. It could be that ex-Celts have been offered but don’t want the job, maybe I’m being too generous. Putting people like Naismith, Kenny Miller and Alex Rae on as pundits when they haven’t a brain between them is ridiculous.
Good article James, made me think about it and you are right, our media is appalling