So Ibrox squeezed through the crack in the door last night and booked their double header against PSV for the Champions League pot of gold. They made around £5 million in the process, which is a nice chunk of change and perhaps gives them some wiggle room in the transfer market. They will almost certainly look to spend; they can’t abide the idea of saving for a rainy day when there are walls waiting to be pissed against.
When you’ve been doing this job as long as I have it’s hard for anything to really surprise you anymore. But the poverty of talent, and the appalling tactics, of the current club at Ibrox have managed to do exactly that.
I listened to the BBC commentary team, including James McFadden, who has surely twigged that kissing up to Ibrox is the way to keep his gig, with incredulity as they praised the second half performance.
But for their high balls into the box, I don’t know where a goal was going to come from. They have signed three strikers in the summer and all of them look like they play with two left feet. Danilo’s miss from an open goal was extraordinary. Dessers might have hit the post with a shot, but he looks cumbersome and out of shape.
Their fans were promised fast flowing football. It flows the way long-ball punt up the park football has always flowed. There is little movement off the ball and little interplay on the deck. Their whole approach is based on having bought big guys they can lump the ball up to. It’s 1980’s stuff, and a better team last night would have blown them out like a birthday cake candle.
Surely PSV won’t lose to this lot for the second year running? That should be the kind of thing that managers get sacked for. If they are even semi-competent, they will heap two humiliations on that Ibrox team either side of Ross County which send The Mooch into the game against us genuinely fearing for his job, and his players shell-shocked and exposed.
On another night they might have been out. Servette, who are no great shakes, not by any manner of means, could have beaten them had they possessed a little composure. They spurned two excellent first half chances, including one at 1-0 to virtually tie up the second. They were woeful in possession though, and looked suspect at the back, which should give you a hint about how bad the Ibrox club were that they managed only a draw.
But that draw was enough. Ibrox gets the money and the double header against the Dutch who warmed up nicely with a 7-2 win on aggregate against Strum Graz. They are more than capable not just of beating the Ibrox side by inflicting the football equivalent of a punishment beating, and they might not need to be particularly brilliant to do it.
Those two games will take place around an away league game to Ross County which the Ibrox club needed like a hole in the head. Malky Mackay will give them a game up there, a proper blood and thunder match which Ibrox will have to play like a cup tie or risk the match against us being a must-win encounter with no room for error at all.
I have no fears about our ability to deal with them that day. They do not look impressive. They do not look like the sophisticated unit their fans were promised and which the media has been expecting to see. They are a mess.
They look disjointed, fragmented and some of them seem scared out of their wits.
They should be too, because whilst they look to all the world like a team fumbling about in search of its identity, we know ours, we’re familiar with the taste of victory and we’re just warming up.
You’re right of course about them being one dimensional and very poor. However I do not share your overconfidence for ibrox and I will outline why:
1. Their tactic (yes, singular) may be ideally suited to playing agains us, sadly. High cross balls to the back post where GregTaylor is Challenging And our unsettled CB pairing.
2. “Todders” appears to have taken a great deal of lessons from Jason Statham back when he was a competitive diver. May be of no value in Europe, but in SPFL this will win them free kicks and penalties.Especially free kicks which aren’t subject to VAR view.
3. No Celtic fans shouldn’t be overlooked, can have an impact.
We’re good enough to beat them but we took a stronger team there no drew 2-2 last season.
What surprised me was how woefully inept the Swiss were. Apart from their goal, mainly toothless up front and wasted more balls than Katie Price. Actually played better for 45 mins at ibrox and wi 10 men. Looked nae better than 3rd rate tae me. Ah think they’ll find PSV an entirely different animal.
Last year, PSV Eindhoven were managed by a big name rookie manager – Ruud Van Nistelrooy – who has since departed, and he was outfoxed by a vastly more experienced former team mate – Giovanni van Bronckhorst – over two legs.
Their destruction of Sturm Graz over two legs is an ominous warning to Ian Beale that this will be Mission: Awfy Hard, Ken.
Like most Dutch sides, PSV play a slight variation on the slick passing game pioneered by a certain Jimmy Hogan and developed by the Austrians in the ‘20s, the Hungarians in the ‘50s and ultimately perfected by the Dutch in the ‘70s – all of whom he influenced, directly or indirectly. Whether Ian Beale’s “Watford, 1982” influenced style, pioneered by the late Graham Taylor, will be a match for it we shall soon find out……
Yes, sevco was mince last night, but to be fair, some of their new players might settle
down eventually, to be OK?
But, last night you could see why the new signings were unwanted by
their previous clubs.
Only Raskin and Cantwell looked up for it – despite Cantwell falling over at
every opportunity.
And as for their ‘big money’ buy Danilo…
yes, it was a tricky cross to convert,
but sevco has bought a Brazilian striker,
who could not score from inside the 6 yard box,
into an empty net… 🙂
@ Bob O. Aye Carmen Miranda couldve scored that and she was a Brazilian. Some miss.
They got through that was the main aim remember they beat dortmund on their way to the europa final.ibrox will not be easy for us do not write them off as that would be madness.
@ Scouse. Agree totally, ye should never write anybody aff, tho against dortmund they were without halland as well as a few other key players, which seemed tae be a regular example the luck they definitely carried on that campaign. That’s no sour grapes, it’s just a bit of perspective.
I agree PSV will be too strong, but our game at Ibrox is another matter, we too look disjointed and although we have had two wins, we are far from our best and losing goals. Going there with no fans is always going to be tricky. One thing Rangers did do well last night was winning the ball back, so it will be competitive.
Agree with what you say about their talent and tactics but have you not noticed our defence is not the tallest and is all over the place. Injuries and indecision are abundant.
With Rangers luck PSV will have 6 injuries or more in the games before they play them.
I’ve purposly watched PSV since the we could have them in our group……
I’m sad to say that the current PSV team will defeat Keep Relevant FC HOME & AWAY…
HH
Two things about this article made me LOL:
1) “… a better team last night would have blown them out like a birthday cake candle” – that reads like the Viz Tony Parsons parody, Tony Pareshole. I know that was the intention, however subtle. More of this please.
2) “They are more than capable not just of beating the Ibrox side by inflicting the football equivalent of a punishment beating ….”. Briliant. Please let this be true. Anything that associates that lot with a severe doing gets me aroused. I might actually watch those games. Although I was expecting a good result against PSV last time and I was totally depressed afterwards.
Good article. I enjoyed it. Thanks.
Hi James
I wouldn’t be so cocky – they will be fighting for their lives when they play us at Ibrox, and it will be dirty and a hundred miles an hour. We are still to get into our stride and I think we will find it tough at Ibrox and would not be surprised if we get beat. Does that mean we won’t win the league? No we have nothing to prove, but they need this win so bad that they will do anything, and I am concerned for our players. As for PSV wouldn’t right off the ibrox team and would bet them to win over two legs for the reasons outlined above. Don’t to say it – some of our fans are in danger of Hubris – and from that you get Nemisis – just dont want our nemisis to be against the paisley road west posturers
Whether the Rangers progress against PSV Indhoven remains to be seen. Personally the Dutch once bitten twice shy surley won’t make the same mistake again, Ruud Van Nistelrooy will lose his job if they do. However Celtic are only going to gather momentum. Brenden Rogers is in this for the long haul and already he’s been flexing his muscles at Lennoxtown. By the time we get to the Old Firm encounter, Celtic and Rogers will have worked a bit longer on the training ground. Its pretty obvious Rogers is attempting to gear up for the Champions league. By the time the winter break comes the gap between Celtic and the rest of the SPL will be out of sight and that includes the Rangers
No! ” o f” encounter!! No real tim every used that term before but since 2012!! Not even guys like you should! You must enjoy giving huns valadation and relevance!! Get a grip man pathetic and Celt using that term but maybe thats the issue eh
Both teams last night played and looked like a couple of nickel&dime teams from a Sunday pub league,just how bad had Genk been for Servett to get by them.
When PSV play them next a right good SCUDDING should be dished out to sevco home and away,but the thing is just what team does the klan klubs fans shout on,their own team or their cousins in ORANGE.
Oh and one last thing wouldn’t it be great and the icing on the cake if Sillyman was to be the player that has a hand in putting the Hun klub out of the champions league,just how does a so called million quid compo and a supposedly 10% sell on clause equate to £30 million+ champions league money.
You haven’t been watching football long enough then James, being cocky isn’t analysis. They were by far the better team 2nd half and did produce a decent away from home performance to go through and while all that fouling, diving and general cheating is anti football, they’re in the next round. We need to start upping our game too as we’re certainly not on fire. Who in our team is gonna step up and sort C.ntwell out I wonder. 3-0 at the midden under the great Ange is my last memory of the Glasgow Derby.
Btw there is no Old Firm Michael, there are too many Celts that seem to have forgotten the death of the Old Firm fixture in 2012 or that are in a position of repeating what they hear on SMSM. HH
” thee great ange”! Geez a break about the Australian he a fraud that couldnt wait to worship at the ” epllll mhare” same as all Aussies true sickening tho thats Australians top to bottom as in they crave validation and relevance for England and America in particular you need to have lived there to ttuky see it,but please no more this character
” epl mayyyhate” even
Any Celt i meant
No Rangers. No 55. No 150 years of history. No Old Firm. Only Sevco the 11 years old tribute act.
I’m not sure what I’d have preferred for Sevco last night… There’s the part of me that said OUT, OUT, OUT and the massive pressure on Beale and his players that’d come with it, however that mean Sevco getting a free week in the run up to The Glasgow Derby not to mention an alleged £5 million bounty of which they will of course spend every last penny on (and as much as I don’t like it – full credit to their board for that to be honest)…
So no doubt they will strengthen with yet more brute strength that’s prefect for the rancid thuggery in this rancid footballing thuggery country –
However they now surely and hopefully face a torrid midweek match in Eindhoven v PSV in the run up to The Glasgow Derby while Celtic have a free week so given the paramount importance of The four Glasgow Derby’s every little advantage helps for sure…
However they had that scenario several times for Glasgow Derby’s in Ange’s first season on their run to The Europa League Final and were still fitter by far then us in The extra time Scottish Cup Semi Final that went a long way to depriving Ange a treble in his first season –
As I said that midweek game should be a huge advantage to Celtic fitness wise – But there again with The ‘Witch Doctor’ from That run to The Europa League Final back at Aye-Brokes – it probably won’t be…
Cheaters then, Cheaters now, and Cheaters Forever ! (Though this £5 million financial bounty has been achieved honestly for once) !
And we’ll watch Celtic get another pasting in the champions league ??????
To all Bhoys that wrote in. Sevco is the name of the Glasgow team.Hail Hail.
You must have been watching a different game James, had a sneaky look at the inside back page of the Daily Record and they gave 5 of their players 8 out of 10.
I sincerely hope that you chanced picking it up in a shop for a free read Micheal – or perhaps found lying on a bus at a train – whatever as long as you didn’t buy it…
These rancid rags like The Record should absolutely NOT be financially aided by Celtic fans !
I have to add that Servette team must surely be the worst to ever have been seen in Champions League qualifiers. Failed to do the basics of controlling or passing the ball. Granted they made a few chances in the first half but a half decent team would have dismisses secco with ease.