Ibrox Crashes Out Of Europe, So The Media Makes It A Negative Story About Celtic.

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“The future’s not set …” the saying goes. “There is no fate but what we make for ourselves.” Who out there remembers the quote and where it comes from? I retain all this stuff; I have one of those brains which just soaks up this kind of thing and files it away in a box for another time. I always liked that one, and I do believe it of course.

Nothing in our lives is mapped out for us, and it’s because of these things that I cannot say, with any surety, what I will be doing, or where I’ll be doing it, or who I’ll be doing it with when Celtic win next season’s SPFL title race and certain Peepul are back in their wee box.

Yet I feel sure that I will not be spending that night worrying about the co-efficient and how we might have to play in a Champions League qualifier. That much I’m pretty certain about. I use the words “pretty certain”: I can’t say definitely.

I could be sleeping in bed that night and sit up suddenly, wide awake, screaming about the co-efficient like someone who has realised he went “for a lie down” hours ago and left a half-eaten takeaway in the oven. (I wish I wasn’t speaking from experience.)

But I have a feeling I’ll have slightly happier thoughts in my mind.

It’s funny, then, that last night and this morning much of the Scottish sporting press has chosen to focus not on what last night’s European exit means for Ibrox and how it dents their confidence further in the wake of the Motherwell defeat (two losses at home in a row; tut tut) but about how bad that result might be for Celtic if we do win next year’s title.

Read that again; last night’s result could be a disaster for Celtic if we win next year’s championship. Don’t peer into the coffee mug or the tea … nobody has drugged you; you are not hallucinating. The papers actually are running variations of that story today.

You could not even make up something as absurd as that, but absurd is what our media does best. It’s what our media thrives upon. Football Scotland has Celtic “in a sweat” over the result last night. I didn’t know laughing could make you sweat, because I’m sure that’s what most people of a Celtic persuasion were doing last night as that unfolded.

“(Ibrox) Europa League loss a coefficient blow as Celtic sweat over UCL spot” is their unintentionally hilarious headline. The Daily Record itself went for the following; “Celtic see Champions League shot hang by a thread as Scotland need mammoth coefficient favour after (Ibrox) defeat.”

Tell me this, if we’d blown the home leg of a European tie after getting a 2-2 draw away from home, on a night when we mustered barely an attack worth talking about or troubled the opposition goalie not at all, would anyone in the media be talking about some hypothetical negative impact on Ibrox? To do this stuff the way they do it, day after day, takes some imagination. It also takes a brass neck that Donald Trump himself would be amazed by.

Last night was an amusing and entertaining evening, but far more amusing is watching people scramble in the aftermath. Suddenly, this Ibrox team is a mere “work in progress” and not one that was being talked about in the context of a quadruple. Their manager is “proud” of the strides they have taken, although they had the tie in the palm of their hand and only had to show up on the night to put away a Benfica side creaking more than Di Maria’s knees.

Celtic wouldn’t even be allowed the hard luck story far less this “it was a victory which only looks like a defeat at the moment” garbage; no, our narrative would be about how we’d blown it and they’d be sifting through every negative record they could find. This is the way they work, the way they operate and always have. And especially this season.

This time next year, when we’re on the brink of a title and in a far better place than we are right now, I may, if I remember to, spare a thought for the hacks who were reduced to pushing this shabby little line last night and this morning, and I will raise a glass to all them.

I’ll be saying “GIRFUY” mind you, but you probably guessed that already.

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  • Roonsa says:

    It’s simple Celtic minded logic. Let me demonstrate that logic in the form of easy to understand pseudocode:

    IF team_a = aka_sevco THEN
    we_want_team_b_to_win_flag = ‘Y’
    ELSIF team_b = aka_sevco THEN
    we_want_team_a_to_win_flag = ‘Y’
    ELSIF celtic_urnae_involved_flag = ‘Y’ THEN
    we_dont_give_a_fuck_flag = ‘Y’
    fuck_it_its_international_weekend_flag = ‘Y’
    give_the_burd_some_of_yer_time_flag = ‘Y’
    END IF

    I don’t care about consequences. I could NEVER want that team to do well in Europe. Even if they try to “sell” it as a benefit to us.

  • Tam says:

    Great piece and so “bloody true” …… CELTIC goalkeeper makes a save in the last minute…. and we will read,hear, and see, how that save kept us in it.
    “The rangers” goalkeeper makes a save in the last minute and the very same people will say,show, and advise, how he was only doing his job with that world class save.

    CELTIC score a goal in the last minute…. and we will read, hear, and be advised how that goal SAVED OUR BLUSHES.
    “THE rangers” score a goal in the last minute…. and once again the very same people will say, show, advise, how that goal makes (champions)

    You could not mark their necks with a blowtorch…. and they have the cheek to call themselves…. pundits, experts, and professionals, oooooops nearly missed out the village idiot Kris Boyd … and presenters

  • Thomas Cochrane says:

    These peepel have absolutely no self awareness on certain situations regarding the team they support, or anything else for that matter.

  • david bowie says:

    so are they assuming that the Sevies will lose the league next season or is it about no second team in the frame which assumes we lose.
    Typical stenographer garbage either way

  • harold shand says:

    Sorry for going off track on this article

    But watching the Kilmarnock manager on tv cheerleading Rangers and repeatedly saying ” we ” is wild stuff man

  • Clachnacuddin and the Hoops says:

    Oh man – A negative story about Celtic in The Scummy Scottish Media – Who’d a thunk it – eh…

    Anyway thanks for flagging it up again James just to let us see their warped and anti Celtic ideology continues unabated indeed –

    And still the ‘odd’ Celtic Supporter will ‘support’ them financially…

    But not for long though as they are headed for The newspaper crematorium and truly it cannot come a day too soon – certainly for me anyway…

    Just how beautiful a feeling will it be to see them go bust and have to scramble around in a blind panic trying to find other income sources to fund their mortgages, car finance payments and struggle to support their families as well –


    • James P. Johnson says:

      Clachnacuddin, thank you for your reply on the other thread but are you saying that Peter Lawwell has been beating up his daughter?

      Is this really true?

      Thanks in advance.


      • Clachnacuddin and the Hoops says:

        No – Not at all James P. – I don’t know the guy, I’m just like every other Celtic supporter – Absolutely pissed off at the fact that we take punch drunk blow after blow from The Scummy Scottish Football Media and Lawwell is like a dummy about it all…

        Compare and contrast to what goes on at Liebrox and how they stick up for their rancid fans come hell or high water though…

        Here’s a wee personal story partly in response to your reply…
        Back in 1993 ma sister was going with a thug from Newcastle, I’d heard stories about his behaviour about her but couldn’t do nothing about it until I ‘caught him’ head butting her at the dancing so outside we went and I won’t lie – I tried to mow him down with my motor – fortunately for him (and probably me) he jumped outta the way and I missed him and rammed a stationary vehicle instead…
        I did this because I dearly love ma one and only sister and to protect her – subsequently he was banned from our house and basically ran outta town and back to England which was best for his own safety to be honest…

        So I did that for ma sister because I love and care for her – He certainly wasn’t getting invited back into the house for more abuse and no more holidays either on ma family were coming his way either…

        So just like I care for ma sister, I love Celtic as well and hate what I have to see James report on here about the daily abuse of ma beloved Celtic by The Scummy Scottish Football Media but I can do something about it by not paying them one red cent which I never do and discouraging any Celtic supporters that I see buying the rags to desist from doing so…

        However – I cannot do anything about Celtic welcoming them into our Paradise, week in, week out, without charge either for them to repay that hospitality with abuse on a daily basis…

        That was the basis of ma ascertation that Lawwell would ‘Probably’ be the type that would forgive the next day ‘peepil’ that abused something that he would and should portray to love…

        And he should love Celtic…

        But does he really when he allows such abuse to go unchecked and unchallenged day after day and week after week !

        • James P. Johnson says:

          Thanks for your reply but I really have no idea what you’re talking about.

  • JimBhoy says:

    It’s all about the Celtic, HH.

  • Kevan McKeown says:

    It’s their way in findin some kind of solace in the reality, that for all their hype, the unstoppable ‘juggernaut’ isnae all they think it is. There’s a shocker there eh ! Find somethin, anythin negative about Celtic. Feel better.

  • John Copeland says:

    Did you see once again the biggest fraud in Scottish football doing his bit for the Rangers last night ? MC Innes ,the coach of Kilmarnock was the go to guy for TNT sports for outside studio comments when he should have been preparing 100% for his club’s weekend fixture ? When are the board of Kilmarnock going to realise that they are being short changed by this cowboy ? I suppose their attitude will be …’that’s the end of that ‘thankfully ,after last night’s result ? Giddy up !

  • Jim says:

    Too true,

    Certainly enjoyed the reaction by the village idiot who resembled edd milliband eating a bacon roll while trying to spin sevco deserved more from the game though.


    What was that famous quote?
    In life the only predictable things are births, deaths and taxes. (No, not Taxis), or words to that effect.
    Not so in the best wee bigoted Kuntry inra wurld.
    Any excuse, no matter how contrived, to print a negative Celtic, or SNP for that matter, story is seized upon as almost a sense of duty by what is arguably the most partisan and bigoted ‘ Medjia ‘ in the Western World. Some claim to fame that.
    And they’ll continue in that vein as their circulation circles the proverbial drain up to the point where the tap is being turned off and they have to print their own obituary and still blaming with their last breath the Unseen Fenian Hand and or the cause of Independence.
    Hell mend them.

  • Effarr says:

    Their goalie was over the moon about how well they played and some of the “pundits” reckon they will do better next year in the competition. When it`s Celtic we are reminded about the number of years when they last won a game at “Porkheid”, never mind in Europe. If Celtic are to win the title
    next year they will have to win it this year too. If they win this year`s one,
    you can be assured there will be no stopping them. If they get their hands on the jackpot, they will spend, legally this time, they will attract better players, being in the CL, and, I`m afraid, it could be many long years in the wilderness. And that`s me being cheery about it all. As for what happens in life: surely when a thing does happen it must obviously have been destined to happen, otherwise it wouldn`t have come to pass. “What is for you won`t go by you” sort of stuff.

  • Andy Duncan says:

    So we deduce that Rangers are not sweating over the loss of a CL spot as they have no expectation of being in that position?

    • Clachnacuddin and the Hoops says:

      “Rangers” will have absolutely no expectation on being in the position Andy…

      As they are no very more, and for their fans it’s very sore !

  • The great jc says:

    Think I probably got that abbreviation in a fraction before you James with a slight addendum and 5 seconds before the final whistle….GIRFUY… sideways…
    a great result if you ask me….. and the best of the night.

  • Michael Clark says:

    Hey, nothing changes with OldFirm F.C. when things ain’t going for them all is quiet as they dissapear into the woodwork. I have a neighbour who follows that lot (when their winning). All during the Ange Postecoglou era, he kept telling me how Scottish football is crap and that’s why Celtic win the league blah blah blah but since the Celtic collapse this year he has a spring in his step. He was so excited about the last clash at Celtic Park because he thought they would win it. Its still not too late to sort this, if we could just get clear of injury and find some kind. This team minus Jota is the side who was beating them like any other team in the SPL. Its so frustrating because for as bad as we’ve been they still can’t beat us

  • pk says:

    to me after celtic the rest are just football teams…………

  • Ryan Ellis says:

    Before I read it I’m gonna say Terminator two. Or the first one, terminator anyway lol!

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