There’s a great wee moment in Alan Parker’s brilliant TV show True Blood – his dark fable about civil rights, set in a world where vampires live openly amongst humans – when a senior member of the blood-sucking fraternity gate-crashes a TV interview with another of his kind on a proposed law called the Vampire Rights Amendment, which seeks to give them “protection under the law.”
He murders a TV anchor live on the air, and takes his seat and looks into the camera with a sneer.
“Why would we seek equal rights? You are not our equals.”
That always makes me laugh. And it always makes me think of Ibrox.
Anyone who doesn’t know already that I abhor the very idea of this “friendly” in Australia hasn’t been paying attention too well.
Nothing is going to turn me around on this.
It is an appalling idea for many reasons, not least of which is the one I’ll write about later; the whole thing risks turning into something we’ll be embarrassed by association with.
There are a lot of Celtic fans who feel as I do about this, who feel a deep sense of betrayal at the hands of the club for embracing Old Firm Incorporated. The club is so dishonest at times it shocks us, and we should be beyond being shocked.
The manipulative way they have pushed Ange to the front of this is appalling.
They have used him to provide cover for their dirty deal.
As angry as Celtic fans are, it has nothing on the fury which has erupted across the city.
It is also present in some of the reportage; read Chris Jack’s bile-filled screed in The Evening Times yesterday ato see examples of it.
They are absolutely livid. It is their reasoning which is amazing.
You see, these Peepul have twigged to a hard truth which is actually acknowledged by Bisgrove in his statement to fans on this yesterday; Ibrox is the warm-up act and Celtic are the main event. Their commercial director gushed about how “privileged” they are just to be there … and they never would have been had Celtic not signed off on it.
We are the star draw.
Our club and our manager are the centrepiece of the event.
It is being built around us.
If we go there as league champions – treble winners even – it will be like a PR tour with the Aussie fans paying homage to a winner.
This show would be going on without them.
They are there to add a little freak-show value.
This is one of the main reasons why I am opposed to it; we do not need them on this and their presence devalues the whole event. But it’s their understanding of this, from the opposite side, that has them so opposed to it.
They recognise their status here and hate it.
The truth is, this is their status now and it has taken this to bring it on home to them.
It is our club which has the global reach, and only by clutching to our coat-tails can they even hope to have such a profile. We should not be letting them near our spotlight for this very reason.
We earned it by being an inclusive and welcoming club.
They are the intolerant dregs of a dead empire, insular and lashing out instead of reaching out.
Without Celtic, what would their worth be?
Their whole claim to fame would be an appeal to a small sect of society, a backward Britishness, with the smell of religious intolerance about it. Who outside of this island would even care they existed?
The whole Old Firm concept stinks in part because it gives them more than it gives us.
It pulls them up even as it drags us down.
What bothers them most is that the whole way this “tournament” is being marketed already reveals that in stark colours which even they can’t pretend not to see. Indeed, they do see it and this is what’s caused their rage.
We are earning more from this event; that’s already doing the rounds on their sites with some of the in-the-knows over there claiming our fee is actually double theirs. They resent and hate that for openers. They hate Ange and Celtic having the star-billing, and in particular if they have to travel for the tournament knowing we’ll parade our trophies.
In those circumstances what role does their club actually play?
The same one Rome’s captives played in a general’s triumph; to be paraded as the real trophies; hapless losers, the hostages of a victorious conqueror, there for no other reason than to amuse the mob.
Or to put it another way, in this rancid little double act we are the straight man, the star, whilst they are the stooge, there to be mocked, slapped, ridiculed and laughed at.
As I’ve said repeatedly, I am wholeheartedly opposed to this.
I do not want them in our spotlight, it does not need them, even as a barely glimpsed figure in its shadow.
But even as I berate our club for doing this, I understand wholly that this is the role theirs would play. I get it.
I see that they are not equal partners in this endeavour but beggars in the gutter, hoping to pick up some scraps from the table.
As much as I say let them starve, I recognise now that they at least acknowledge their status, they at least understand what they are.
Need, there’s the word. They need us, we do not need them. Our Board and the endorsement of this tour is no more than Celtic allowing that lot to be part of our success. I feel it will not happen, more because Ibrox will wilt. Let them do their own tour in some other country and let Ange go home for a well deserved “Homecoming”, and the plaudits of Celtic fans in Oz.
Our board need to wake up. Years of being handcuffed to that abusive filth ended in 2012, with their justified death, a direct result of one of their corruptions, not of our actions sadly.
Celtic board – we’re not a pair, not a couple, we’re not married, we’re not dependent on their money, we’re not their bitch – so stop whoring us out with them.
Its only a mistake if you do it once, otherwise its planned. HH
Spot on James